Singforjesus0612

Carnality

2009-07-04T10:07:00.000-07:00

I pulled this article from the website, www.timelesstruths.org. It really challenged me this morning, lest I think of myself to be something when I am nothing, I always have the Holy Spirit to remind me that there is constant work to be done on me. Constant shaving of myself and yielding to the spirit of God.

Symptoms of Carnality
The following are some of the symptoms of carnality. Reader, the Holy Spirit alone can interpret and apply this tract to your individual case. As you read, examine yourself, as if in the presence of God.

Do you ever feel:
l. A secret sense of pride; an exalted feeling in view of your success or your position; because of your good training and appearance; because of your natural gifts and abilities; an important, independent spirit; stiffness and preciseness?
2. Love of human praise; a secret fondness to be noticed; love of supremacy; drawing attention to self in conversation; a swelling out of self when you have had a free time speaking or praying?
3. The stirrings of anger or impatience—but worst of all you call it nervousness or holy indignation; a touchy, sensitive spirit; a disposition to resent and retaliate when reproved or contradicted: sharp, heated flings at one another?
4. Self-will: a stubborn, unteachable spirit; an arguing, talkative spirit; harsh, sarcastic expressions; an unyielding, head-strong attitude; a driving, commanding spirit; a disposition that loves to be coaxed and humored?
5. Carnal fear: a man-fearing spirit; a shrinking from reproach and duty; reasoning around the cross; a shrinking from doing your whole duty by those of wealth or position, a fearfulness that someone will get out of the Spirit and thus offend and drive some prominent person away; a compromising, holding-back tendency?
6. A jealous disposition; a secret spirit of envy shut up in your heart; an unpleasant sensation in view of the great prosperity and success of another; a disposition to speak of the faults and failings, rather than the gifts and virtues of those more talented and appreciated than yourself?
7. Lustful stirrings; unholy actions; a carnal yearning; undue affection and familiarity toward those of the opposite sex; wandering eyes; something in you that could not be trusted if sufficient opportunity presented itself?
8. A dishonest, deceitful disposition; evading and covering the truth, covering up your real faults; leaving a better impression of yourself than is strictly true; false humility; exaggeration; straining the truth?
9. Unbelief; a spirit of discouragement in times of pressure and opposition, lack of quietness and confidence in God, lack of faith and trust in God; a disposition to worry and complain in the midst of pain, poverty, or at the dispensations of Divine Providence; an over-anxious feeling whether everything will come out all right?
10. Formality and deadness; lack of concern for lost souls; dryness and indifference; lack of power with God; selfishness, love of ease; love of money?
11. Stinginess; being over-exacting with trifles; falling out with others over a few apples, chickens, or pigs; giving just enough to ease my conscience, and less than a poor laborer does for the furtherance of the Gospel at home or abroad; big meals when away from home, but cheap ones for wife and children who seldom get out?
12. Sectarianism; being narrow and bigoted in favor of my little crowd, cool and unlovely toward others who differ with me; ready to argue and take the contrary side instead of studiously avoiding those things that might break sweet fellowship; pulling to get members, even though I steal them from another congregation; sitting back with a critical and over-wise air, and failing to cooperate with others for the salvation of souls.

A Checklist
Do I become provoked and kick the cat or dog, slap the children in anger, or speak snappish to my loved ones?
Do I go up the miff tree when slighted, imposed upon, or rebuked? What am I like when taken to task by one in authority; when not put first; when not appreciated; when others are advanced over me? Do I ever have the pouts? The sulks?
How do I react when I cannot have my own way, or when others do better than I?
Is the praise of men sweet to my taste? Do I love to have my name head the list? Do I enjoy being flattered; being at the head of things? Am I gentle toward all men?
Down in the depths of my heart (though I may not say a word) do I feel the stirrings of anger? Of envy? Of jealousy? Of revenge? Of bitterness?
Do I enjoy having the best chair, the best apple in the dish, the best piece of pie on the plate—when others have what is left? Do I seek the easiest and most congenial tasks?

These are some of the traits which generally indicate a carnal heart. If one principle is lurking there, others may be also. Through prayer, confession and faith, hold your heart open to the searching light of God and ask the Holy Ghost to enable you to bring your “old man” to the death: “Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed [not suppressed], that henceforth we should not serve sin.”* (Romans 6:6) Do not patch over, but go to the bottom. It will pay.

Disturbed..

2008-12-17T13:37:00.001-08:00

Ok, I'm disturbed! What woman would marry a man...

1.) that you've only been dating for 4 months?
2.) that's thirty years your senior?
3.) that's already been married 4 times?
4.) who's last two wives have misteriously died or disappeared?

Seriously!?!? With so much of your life ahead of you, why would you CHOOSE to enter into a relationship with this man?

A Reminder of God's Promises...

2008-11-18T11:51:00.000-08:00

So yesterday, God reminded me of a passage of scripture that he had given me well over a year ago. I read it and was temporarily comforted, but soon all of my doubts, worries and fears seemed to rush in on me to get me to panic. So, this morning has been somewhat of a battle, but while listening to someone elses problems and attempting to uplift them, I was reminded once again about God's promise to take care of me. Luke 12:22 - 34 has been the bedrock of my salvation over the last 2-3 years, and of all the things I've learned during this time, I always have to remind myself that seeking God is the most important thing in this life.

22 And he said unto his disciples, Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat; neither for the body, what ye shall put on.
23 The life is more than meat, and the body is more than raiment.
24 Consider the ravens: for they neither sow nor reap; which neither have storehouse nor barn; and God feedeth them: how much more are ye better than the fowls?
25 And which of you with taking thought can add to his stature one cubit?
26 If ye then be not able to do that thing which is least, why take ye thought for the rest?
27 Consider the lilies how they grow: they toil not, they spin not; and yet I say unto you, that Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.
28 If then God so clothe the grass, which is to day in the field, and to morrow is cast into the oven; how much more will he clothe you, O ye of little faith?
29 And seek not ye what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, neither F32 be ye of doubtful mind.
30 For all these things do the nations of the world seek after: and your Father knoweth that ye have need of these things.
31 But rather seek ye the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you.
32 Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom.
33 Sell that ye have, and give alms; provide yourselves bags which wax not old, a treasure in the heavens that faileth not, where no thief approacheth, neither moth corrupteth.
34 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

God's Tender One

2008-11-17T17:24:00.000-08:00

The following passage of scripture was encouraging to me today...

Ezekiel 17:22-24

Thus saith the Lord GOD; I will also take of the highest branch of the high cedar, and will set it' I will crop off from the top of his young twigs a tender one, and will plant it upon an high mountain and eminent:
In the moutain of the height of Israel will I plant it: and it shall bring forth boughs, and bear fruit, and be a goodly cedar: and under it shall dwell all fowl of every wing; in the shadow of the branches thereof shall they dwell.
And all the trees of the field shall know That I the Lord have brought down the high tree, have exalted the low tree, have dried up the green tree, and have made the dry tree to flourish: I the Lord have spoken and have done it.

Hold On By Moses Hogan

2008-11-13T23:16:00.000-08:00

Here is one of my favorite choral works, by one of my favorite choral arrangers/composers, "Hold On" as arranged by Moses Hogan. The conductor of the first choir is quite exciting to watch, however the second choir does a better job of actually singing the piece, especially at the end where the sopranos take the high, high "C" (one of the soloists reaches a high "F"). I also like the tenor solo on the second one, the guy is really SINGING this song. However I think it is a differences can be attributed to the the different levels of the choir, one a High School mass choir and the other a professional mature choir. Nonetheless, both renditions are simply excellent. And on that note, the music critic is heading to bed.

My Right To Vote...

2008-10-30T13:27:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday, November 4th, I am going to the polls and will exercise my right to vote. It is a right that was denied my ancestors, even up until the last century, and I don't intend to let the opportunity pass.

So, this note is not about voicing my opinion as to who I'm voting for, and why, but instead I hope to express my mild frustration with the way people tend to act around election time.

I am a bit annoyed with people, Democrats and Republicans alike, who go around trying to strong arm others into feeling the way they do about certain canidates. It is really...rude behaviour when we get into name calling and just downright rude statements based upon the persons right to vote however they choose. Because I vote the way I do, I am not a bad person, a bad christian, a bad citizen, a terroist,a racist, an idiot, an elitist, or any such thing. I am a person, an American citizen (by birth) that is exercising my right to vote in a presidential election. I have my reasons for voting for whom I vote, and I can only assume that others vote based on their knowledge and values,be it spiritual, economic, social, etc... I certainly will not get into saying people are unsaved because they will/will not vote a certain way, that's not my call to make. I certainly will not undermine another person's intelligence or integrity because they choose not to vote for the person i'm voting for. Than's uncalled for, and in my opinion just downright not a good thing.

Let's cut out the foolishness, and move on. The important thing is that we vote, I do not care, do not want to know, and certainly need to know for whom a person is voting. But if I happen to know, I certainly will show the utmost respect to you as a human being. I am not going to base your entire character on who you decide to vote for. I only wish we could all have the same respect for each other. It will certainly cut down on a lot of unnecesary mess, hurt feelings and dis-unity.

Going after God in the wildernes...

2008-10-07T15:03:00.000-07:00

Jeremiah 2:1-2

Moreover the word of the LORD came to me, saying,
Go and cry in the ears of Jerusalem, saying, Thus saith the LORD; I remember thee, the kindness of thy youth, the love of thine espousals, when thou wentest after me in the wilderness, in a land that was not sown.

Frustrations...

2008-09-22T20:58:00.000-07:00

Do you ever have those times, when you wish you could tell people exactly how you feel? Exactly what you think of their behavior towards you? And you wish that they FOR ONCE would not only hear, but listen and understand where you're coming from? That FOR ONCE they would consider you? Not hear what you have to say, and then immediately go down the list of all of your "infractions". You wish that they would not go "tit for tat" with you. But of course, when you do that you have to take the chance that they will not see or understand where you're coming from. And I also take into consideration, I may be causing an offense or annoyance to someone unknowingly. Still, I find it extremely frustrating and unfair to be wrongfully judged, and as much as I want to explain myself I can't because it will just cause a bigger problem! AAAGGGHH!!! I think I need to just get away for a while.

Fall Fashion Trends 2008...

2008-09-15T22:43:00.000-07:00

So let me start by saying, I LOVE the good old fashioned way of holiness. I love dressing modestly, but within the confines of modesty I like to stay aware of current fashion trends. Not to say that I follow trends to the point, or admire them to the point that I'm in a battle to dress immodestly. But it's cool, and somewhat of a good challenge to make popular fashion trends work with modest clothing. I have been observing the Fall Fashion Trends of 2008 (because I LOVE fall fashion), and here are my finds...

1.) Purple and Grey are the colors to wear
2.) Shirtdresses are totally in (YEA FOR DRESSES!!)
3.) Ankle boots also totally in (I keep seeing all of these cool Victorianesque boots, and i'm loving it)

Ok, so that's what I've observed so far? Are there any other obvious trends that you see?

So on my end, my mom bought me really nice wool material of purple and grey plaid for a skirt. Now I need to find a pattern and seamstress.

I also bought some cute purple Crocs for a great price recently. I think I have more purple and/or grey stuff, but I can't think right now because I should be in the bed.

Ok, that's all for now!! Goodnight world!

The Death of the Righteous

2008-09-08T22:10:00.000-07:00

I don't know quite how to say, what I have to say, but I'm gonna give it all I have!!! I was riding down the street the other day, and saw one tree in particular, that had leaves that were already turning colors, half was green and the other half bright red. I got excited about the prospect of fall, excited to see the change in the seasons. Well, it occured to me, that there are probably only a few people who will not stand in awe of the beauty of autumn, when the leaves are changing colors, and beginning to fall to the ground. But you know what? In all of our admiration, the tree is actually going through a dying process. Yep, it's dying!!!! And while it dies, we stand and say, "Oh, isn't that beautiful."

Then it came to my mind, when I'm in a test, and I am dying to my flesh, or dying to my will, dying to my ways, dying so that Christ may live, that it should be a beautiful sight. That people should be able to look on me and behold a beautiful thing. Not look and say, "Ewww!! She's dying." They shouldn't see decay, they should see the handiwork of God in all of it's splendor. Most of all, when God looks on me, in my "dying process", what does he see? Does he look and say, "That's Good"? Or does he see something that he doesn't want to see?

When I was growing up, we would listen to the local christian music station, and during the daytime they had a program who's theme song said, "This may be your turning point." Ah yes, this mighty revelation on the beauty of dying may very well be the turning point for my life. I've been in a...test...a trial... and it seems that all that God gave me over the past couple of years, he's taken away, whether permanently or temporarily, he's seemed to have stripped me down, and have me at a complete stand still in life right now. There are NO trains coming or leaving the station, as it were. :) I won't go into, all the things I've experienced, or my reactions to them, but I will say that I see a little more clearly what God is doing. Not that I know where he's taking me, or where we're heading, or even what his next move will be. But I think i've figured out what i'm supposed to do while I wait. Allow things to die, and as I lose things such as possessions, and pieces of myself (my will, my mindset, my attitude), etc... I should just let the beauty of Christ be shown. That as he looks at me as I die, and others look at me as I die, they would see no pain, no decay, but beauty only; Jesus only!

I Asked The Lord

2008-09-02T20:06:00.000-07:00

So, I'm trying to learn the piano, so I've been up going through some hymn books and trying to see if I can't figure out how to play some of those tunes. Anyhoo I came across this song, and thought that it was absolutely beautiful. So, I decided to find it and post it on my blog. It's the brilliantly, moving Mahalia Jackson singing. ENJOY!

God's Way Is Best

2008-09-02T08:54:00.000-07:00

This song has become my anthem over the last few weeks, and I essentially have to sing it "til all the clouds remove". In other words, I have to sing it until my heart believes it and knows that it is true... Thanks Sis. Mitch and Reba for your comments, they have certainly given me comfort and a way of looking at this current situation from more than just my own narrow point of view. And for the sake of it, below I have posted lyrics to "God's Way is Best", because it certainly is.

God’s way is best; if human wisdom
A fairer way may seem to show,
’Tis only that our earth-dimmed vision
The truth can never clearly know.

Refrain:God’s way is best, I will not murmur,
Although the end I may not see;
Where’er He leads I’ll meekly follow,
God’s way is best, is best for me.

Had I the choosing of my pathway,
In blindness I should go astray,
And wander far away in darkness,
Nor reach that land of endless day.

He leadeth true;
I will not question,
Though through the valley I shall go;
Though I should pass through clouds of trial,
And drink the cup of human woe.

God’s way is best; heart, cease thy struggling
To see and know and understand;
Forsake thy fears and doubts, but trusting,
Submit thyself into His hand.

Thy way is best, so lead me onward,
My all I give to Thy control;
Thy loving hand will truly guide me,
And safe to glory bring my soul.

Seperation...

2008-08-25T20:06:00.000-07:00

So, I haven't blogged in a really long time. It's not because I haven't had much that I could talk about, but I guess I've been just busy. In my "e-absence" I've been having a lot of... life lessons...I guess that's what they're called. It certainly can be called the "trial of my faith", without a doubt!

So, right now i'm going through a "separation" of sorts. One of my highest dreams has been sacrificed, and to be honest, it kind of hurts. I am resolved however, that if this has to be the way, well then let it be. I feel like "Much Afraid" from the book Hinds Feet on High Places. You know, on her quest to find a new name, and a home in the mountains. So many times, it would seem as if she were on her way to the high places only to reach an impossible impasse, or dangerous precipice, all seemingly impossible and impassable situations. And with every dissappointment, she had to somehow find courage and faith to follow the path that was chosen for her, by the Shepherd, although it seemed she would NEVER reach her goal. After many of these "situations" look at this conversation that she had with the Shepherd, I found it quite mind blowing...

The laughter died down on his face, and very seriously he asked, "Do you love me enough to be able to trust me completely, Much-Afraid?"

She looked at him in the usual startled fashion so natural to her whenever she sensed that he was preparing her for a new test, then faltered, "You know that I do love you Shepherd, as much as my cold little heart is capable. You know that I love you and that I long to trust you as much as I love you, that I long both to love and trust you still more."

"Would you be willing to trust me," he asked, "even if everything in the wide world semed to say that I was deceiving you - indeed that I had deceived you all along?"

She looked at him in perplexed amazement. "Why, yes, " she said, "I'm sure I would, because one thing I know to be true, it is impossible that you should tell a lie. It is impossible that you should deceive me. I know that I am often very frightened at the things which you ask me to do, " she added shamefacedly and apologetically, "But I could never doubt you in that way. It's myself I am afraid of, never of you, and though everyone in the world should tell me that you had deceived me, I should know it was impossible.

"O Shepherd," she implored, don't tell me that you think I really doubt you, even when I am most afraid and cowardly and dispicably weak. You know - you know I trust you. In the end I know I shall be able to say thy gentleness hath made me great."

He said nothing for a little, only looked down very tenderly, almost pitifully at the figure now crouching at his feet. Then, after a time, he said very quietly, "Much-Afraid, supposing I really did deceive you? What then?

(WOW! How would you respond to that????)

It was then her turn to be quite silent, trying to grasp this impossible thing he was suggesting and to think what her answer would be. What then? Would it be that she could never trust, never love him again? Would she have to be alive in the world wher there was no Shepherd, only a mirage and a broken lovely dream? To know that she had been deceived by one she was certion could not deceive? To lose him?

Suddenly she burst into a passion of weeping, then after a little while looked straight up into his face and said, "my Lord - if you can deceive me, you may. It can make no difference. I must love you as long as I continue to exist. I cannot live without loving you."

He laid his hands on her head, then with a touch more tender and gentle than anything she had ever felt before, repeated as though to himself, "If I can, I may deceive her." Then without another word he turned and went away.

Much-Afraid picked up a little icy-cold pebble which was lyong on the ground where he had stood, pit it in her bag, then tremblingly rejoined Sorrow and Suffering and they continued their journey.

Wow!! But this begs the question? Can God, would God, deceive us? No, I don't think he would. Like the scripture says he cannot lie. But sometimes, he opens a door and leads us along, and we think we're going one place, but really he has in mind that we should go elsewhere. But, he doesn't bother to tell us along the way, that we're really not going to the place where we thought we were going, but eventually we start to see the signs. But this has reminded me of a song that we sing often, "God's Way is Best"...

"He leadeth through I will not question, though through the valley I may go
Thy loving hand will truly guide me, and safe to glory bring my soul..."

Sometimes I think i'm like Much-Afraid in a LOT of ways. I know exaclty how she feels when she was saying how unfathomable it was to imagine a world where there was no Shepherd to love. I would rather choose to love him, through impossible situations, than to choose to leave him because I felt that he'd deceived me.

So i say all that, to say this....

Lord, I choose to trust you, even if it seems that you're leading me AWAY from what I thought was the promise. I may cry, and hurt a little bit, but please don't mistake that for ingratitude, or doubt. I love you more today than ever before, and cannot imagine life without you.

Yours truly,

Jackie

My Glory

2008-04-05T07:04:00.000-07:00

Jeremiah 9:23-24 (King James Version)

23 Thus saith the LORD, Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, neither let the mighty man glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches:
24 But let him that glorieth glory in this, that he understandeth and knoweth me, that I am the LORD which exercise lovingkindness, judgment, and righteousness, in the earth: for in these things I delight, saith the LORD.

Psalm 75:6 For promotion cometh neither from the east, nor from the west, nor from the south. 7 But God is the judge: he putteth down one, and setteth up another.

I am so glad that I "know" God, and in some measure understand him. This much I do understand of him, he wants to be praised and glorified above all things. Therefore we never need fight a battle, nor rely on our own strength, nor our own talent, nor our own ability, we simply need to glorify God for the potential he's placed in us, show him that we're willing to be used, and HE'LL do the rest! I for one, like Brother Griffin says, "Don't thank my lucky stars. I KNOW where my goodness comes from." I'm reminded of the Psalm that says, the earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof... All that I am is because of the GOODNESS of God.

So this weekend I've had an opportunity to participate in a play at school, which has been very cool. However, afterwards people will come up and laud me with accolades and such, and I think to myself, "If only I can make these people understand that MY GLORY, my ONLY GLORY is only in knowing Jesus the son and God the Father!". That's MY GLORY! What they see is a direct result of the grace, power and GIFTS of God. I TOTALLY realize that I would not have the will nor the ability to accomplish these feats on my own. In fact, I stand in just as much amazement as anyone. It's almost as if i'm looking at myself and saying, "God! I had NO clue of the potential that you've placed in me." And, for truth, of myself I have NO idea how to bring those potentials to life.

So, I say, "Thank you God. Thanks for allowing me to know you, and understand you. And thank you for letting me use your gifts and talents for your glory."

Love, Jackie

Warrior Is A Child/Do I Trust You Lord by Twila Paris

2008-01-21T22:51:00.000-08:00

Two awesome songs. Yes, I will trust you Lord!

Lately I've been winning battles left and right
But even winners can get wounded in the fight
People say that i'm amazing, strong beyond my years
But they don't see inside of me i'm hiding all the tears

They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when noone is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while
Cause deep inside this armor, the warrior is a child

Unafraid, because his armor is the best
But even soldiers need a quiet place to rest
People say that i'm amazing, never face retreat
But they don't see the enemies that lay me at his feet

They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when noone is around
I drop my sword and look up for a smile
Cause deep inside this armor, Deep inside this armor, Deep inside this armor, the warrior is a child

And do I trust you Lord, does the river flow
Do I trust you Lord, does the north winds blow
You can see my heart, you can read my mind
And you've got to know I would rather die
Than to lose my faith in the one I love
Do I trust you Lord?
Do I trust you?

I will trust you Lord when I don't know why
I will trust you Lord 'til the day I die
I will trust you Lord when I'm blind with pain
You were God before
And you'll never change
I will trust you, I will trust you, I will trust you Lord
I will trust you, I will trust you, I will trust you Lord
I will trust you, I will trust you, I will trust you Lord

Revelation on the Thicket

2008-01-06T19:57:00.001-08:00

So, in this morning's service I had a revelation on the "thicket", so i thought I would share with my blogger audience. "What is a thicket?," you may ask. Well, i'll tell you. Dictionary.com defines it as...a thick or dense growth of shrubs, bushes, or small trees or Something suggestive of a dense growth of plants, as in impenetrability or thickness. Well, a while ago our Pastor was encouraging the single saints (mainly sisters) using the example of Abraham and Isaac. We all know the story of how God told Abraham to take his son Isaac up unto a mountain and sacrifice him. Abraham waited on God's promise of a son for years, produced an heir that should not have been (Ishmael), witnessed a birth of a miracle baby by a woman ninety years old conceived by a man of one hundred, and I can only imagine finally saw the beginnings of God's great plan and promise that he would make a GREAT nation of Isaac. Only to get to a point where God demands that he sacrifice the very son, that was the fulfillment of God's promise. Abraham, the faithful man of God was willing to obey, and so set out for the mountain to obey God's command. Just as he was ready to yield the fatal blow, God stopped him and commended him for his love and obedience. And, provided to Abraham a "ram in the thicket". (Genesis 22:1-12)

Well, I said (Ever so humbly), "That's all well in good, that God has a ram in the thicket. But "WHERE IS THE THICKET????". In my mind i'm thinking that there is a general thicket, wherin hides all of the rams and that one day, "Voila!" a ram would appear that was in the thicket all along. Then I even went on to think, "Well, if the rams are in the thicket we need to set fire or smoke to the thicket, and force the rams out. SMOKE 'EM OUT!" Let me just say I was WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!!! My way of thinking about this thing was all wrong, and it took the spirit of God to show me, in his own way, what the purpose and plan for the thicket is. Or my importantly, what his purpose and plan for the entire mountain-top experience was. This morning, as the preacher was delivering the sermon, I realized that EVERY individual has their own INDIVIDUAL thicket, wherein is the ram for their specific life. He mentioned that Abraham had to go UP, UP, UP to the mountain and be put to the TEST, before God revealed the thicket and the ram.

Where is the thicket, and where are the rams? Well first of all, it's not in the plains; it's not in a plain, common, unchallenging, unsurrendered experience. It's high up on the mountain of my spiritual life. It's at the height of my spiritual mountain top, near my very own altar whereon is bound my desires of life and my future, no matter how God given and God ordained they are. God will require that I bind the very thing he promised me to the altar, and I will see neither thicket nor ram until "all on the altar is laid". I thought it was enough to just "bind" it to the altar, until someone brought to my attention God saw into Abraham's HEART (not just his actions) that he was deadset on killing his son, his promise, just because God asked him too. So, do you know what that means? I can't fake it! I can't go through the motions, of getting to the mountain-top, and "fake-killing" my promise/desire, so that i trick God into revealing the thicket and the ram.

And as I type this, would you also like to know what i'm realizing? THE RAM IS NOT THE PRIZE! The son was the prize. The PROMISE was the prize. The blessing was not necesarily in the Ram as much as it was in the promise of a great nation through the son that he was asked to sacrifice. God didn't create a nation of the ram, but the ram was an acceptable substitute for the promise. I like to think of it as an "outward showing of an inward work". What do I mean? Abraham's heart and desire were all on that altar ready to be yielded, but in the end he was not required to give up the greatest desire of his heart, but in fact the promises of God were fulfilled. Instead, his will, and the ram is what was actually sacrificed. If you think equationally, it would look something like this.

Abraham's will=RAM=TRUE SACRIFICE, Slain on the Altar

God's promise to Abraham and his hearts desire=ISAAC=Fulfilled, Alive and Well

I like to think of that ram as my will. In the "thick of things" struggling to break free and get away, or rather just have it's way. But you know what, in the end in order to acheive the blessings of God both my will and the ram will have to be sacrificed.

*Disclaimer* Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus. Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. (Phillipians 3:12-14)

Just for the sake of it...

2007-10-24T20:06:00.000-07:00

Hello adoring Blog Fans! So, I thought i'd take a few moments just to catch up. Life is going pretty good, therefore I dare not complain.

First of all, I found out today that the result of my "solo" audition, pre-break, was successful. I auditioned, at the advice of my voice teacher though not altogether confident of my performance. But lo, and behold, I got the part. For our Christmas concert we're doing Benjamin Britten's "Ceremony of Carols", and I have a solo and a part of a duet. That makes me very nervous, yet excited, panicked, yet elated. Boy, with all of these conflicting emotions I might get a headache. And, of course, I say this not to boast of my accomplishments, but in all things to give thanks to God, and recognize that without him I can be nothing at all. And I mean that from the bottom of my heart. I am living a dream, and it's so amazing to me. The thing I've wanted to so much to happen, he's making to happen and also making me to flourish. It's not without it's pain, sacrifice and some disappointments, but truly, truly, when he does a thing, he does it well!

I'm not altogether unfamiliar with "Ceremony of Carols" as we sang several songs from it while in high school, mainly "This Little Babe" and "Wolcum Yole". Ah, sweet WY Concert Choir memories.

Oh, going back to giving Glory to God, have I mentioned lately, how absolutely grateful I am to have him involved in the small things in my life. I mean the intricate details? I mean even down to where he helped me pass a test, literally!! An "A" on my music history exam!?!? NOTHING BUT THE MERCY!!! Or i'll just say like my friend Mares, "MERCY!". One word does it all!

In other news, it never ceases to amaze me how unbelievably unhelpful are tech support. I had to call Microsoft today about a seemingly small issue, do you know I was given six different numbers and never really helped!?!? It was amazing. Well, amazingly frustrating. I eventually figured out the answer to my own issue, or rather stumbled upon the solution is more like it. Three, loooonnnggg hours it took. I stand amazed, and not in a good way.

Well, that's about all I have to say, I've been feeling a little sick the last couple of days, so as I continue typing and looking at this bright screen my thoughts are starting to muddle. So, I'm thinking that's enough incoherency for one night. :)

Another Recipe...

2007-10-08T20:46:00.000-07:00

Here's one more recipe for the world, my attempt at "Organic" Carrot cake. :)

Cake
2 cups whole wheat flour
2 cups organic/natural sugar
2 teasp. baking soda
2 teasp. cinnamon
1 teasp. Lite salt
3 cups grated carrots (@ 3 grated Earthbound organic carrots…fresh!)
4 organic brown eggs
1 teasp. vanilla extract
1 1/2 cup Enova Oil
*Optional* Raisins

1.Sift dry ingredients into a mixing bowl.
2.Mix in grated carrots, vanilla, eggs.
3.Beat, and add oil slowly.
4.Stir in Raisins
5.Pour into a buttered 8"x12" pan, or two 8" diameter round pans.
6.Bake at 325 degrees for 35-45 minutes or until the center is done.
7.Let cool.

Frosting
8 oz. Fat Free Philadelphia cream cheese
1 stick unsalted butter
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 lb. Fat Free powdered sugar
rind of an orange
walnuts

1.Beat cream cheese, adding butter, orange rind, and vanilla.
2.Add powdered sugar in thirds, beating.
3.Frost cake, top with nuts.

Just like Mom's....

2007-10-08T20:36:00.000-07:00

So, I thought I would be kind and post a recipe my mom gave me for homemade chicken and noodles. This has become a staple in my diet, easy to cook and freeze and reheat. Tasty, filling, and healthy, it's perfect for the "soon to be" cold days. I hope you enjoy!

JL's Chicken and Noodles

Chicken Noodle Soup (Makes @ 6 servings)

2 Boneless Chicken Breasts (or other Chicken parts)
4-6 Chicken Bouillon Cubes
Seasoning (I try to use seasoning options w/ little or no salt, "Simply Organic" All-Purpose Seasoning is a good option)
@3-4 bay leaves, crushed
@ 1 cup chicken broth
1 can cream of chicken soup
Noodles (I prefer Healthy Harvest, Wheat blend extra-wide noodles or any "Egg-Free" noodle)
Baby Carrots
Celery

1. Season chicken parts (onion w/parsley, garlic w/parsley, all purpose seasoning and/or poultry seasoning)
2. Set chicken, carrots and celery to boil w. bay leaves and bouillon cubes for @ 1.5-2 hours, or until chicken is completely cooked through
3. Add chicken broth, and continue to boil for @ 30 minutes
4. Boil noodles separately, when tender drain and add to chicken pot
5. Add cream of chicken soup, reduce to simmer and stir to mix ingredients

Ready to Serve!

I'm up waaayyy too late...

2007-10-07T00:47:00.000-07:00

So, I was sitting here on my computer, way past what should be my bed time, so I decided to do a quick post. Actually, I was making great headway towards being to bed at a reasonable hour, however, I started fooling around with a bunch of audio programs, trying my hardest to extract the vocals from a mp3 track. I was asked to sing at a wedding tomorrow afternoon, and wasn't able to secure a pianist, therefore, I needed to be clever in providing myself with some sort of background. Well, three programs, and several online searches later, I finally thought of a different song. So, I just changed the words around a bit, and almost immediately found the background track for it. I'm was a little upset that I hadn't thought of that earlier or I would be in bed now!

By the way, here's a really cool website that I use from time to time (and where I found the background for this song). They have a lot of good songs on here.

http://www.bensonsound.com/catalog/atoz.cfm?startlet=kZ&stoplet=m0&rangelimit=

Well, I started putting away some laundry, then my ADD kicked in and I started looking for clothes for tomorrow, and then ADD kicked in again and I decided to do a search on my clothes for tomorrow. LOL! Ok, let me explain. While looking in my closet I found a polka dot dress, that I haven't worn in a looonnng time because I lost the sweater to it, and haven't found something suitable to wear with it, until tonight! I paired it with a polka dot jacket that i bought recently. It is actually a very good match of black with white polka dots (the black in the jacket and on the dress are a little different, but close enough that I don't think most people will be able to tell), so i'll just wear the jacket in place of the sweater and it gives the dress a whole new look.

Even so, though I think it looks pretty good I decided to do a search to find out if "certain types of people" should wear "certain types of patterns" and I found that small polka dots are ok, because they have a "slimming affect", according to one online columnist.
Then of course my mind went to what shoes would be perfect, and I thought, "Wow some red pumps would be stunning!" But of course, i don't have red pumps. Then I started thinking about those red pumps that I started to buy a few months back, but didn't. Sigh....

Ok, so i'm not usually so shallow, chattering on about fashion and such, but hey, it's 3 am. What do you expect??? Ok, going to bed now, goodnight!

Just one of those days...

2007-09-12T21:01:00.000-07:00

So, today was one of THOSE days. Have you ever had one of "those" days, when you're just like, "Why?". It started out with me getting really sick around 5 am this morn, and I was sick for a straight two hours then I finally drifted off to sleep. I slept for like an hour or so, and then had to get up and get ready for class. First of all, let's talk about "irony". So, i'm the FIRST person to tell anyone not to take an 8:30 am class, however, I have a 9:00 am class, but I need to get there around 8:45 am just to find a parking spot. I might as well have taken an 8:00 or 8:30 class!!!!

So, back to my story. Off to school I went and my first class wasn't SO bad but my second class, though, was a doozie! Chamber singers made me want to cry today. I felt so stupid and intimidated by my lack of vocal and theoretical prowess (in other words, I can't sight read and I don't even sing as good as the other people in my class!!!) I got really, really, really frustrated and just wanted to get up and walk out. I'm not used to being the novice when it comes to musical experience, and let me tell you it's NOT a good feeling. I felt like (though I cannot fully validate my statement) the girl next to me was talking to me like I was really stupid, and because of it I felt really stupid. I wanted to grab my things and RUN out of there; but I didn't. I stayed the entire time and suffered through an entire hour of utter humiliation. Oh yeah, and while I was feeling really bad, my phone rang in the middle of them going over parts! HOW EMBARRASSING. And you know what it really ironic and cruel, my phone is usually off during class, and even if it's not I usually CANNOT get a signal at all in the choir room. I mean I usually can't get a signal in the entire performing arts part of the building. What are the chances...

Antiways after the class I bolted to my car and called my sister, who gave me some great encouragement. I talked to Nike for a little bit too, and who in the world can still be upset after talking to sweet Nike?

Fundamentals of Music was my next class, and it wasn't much better. I have the hardest times counting out dotted rhythms and sixteenth notes. Another frustrating situation that made me want to cry. Actually I think just the culmination of the morning's experience, and the afternoon experience left me rather weepy. To add to it, by the afternoon I had started feeling really sick again. So, after this second class I decided to follow my motto, "When the going gets tough, the tough go shopping!" I stopped by the mall because that almost always makes me feel better. There I obtained some new pj's and some bath stuff. On my way home from the mall I stopped at the grocery store, because I was running low on grocery. Besides, I figured it was time for me to eat a good meal. My mother has been reprimanding me over the last few days because I keep calling her and complaining of how sick I feel and she'll pray with me and give me a good talking to about my eating habits! I must say I agree with her. So, I bought some grocery, came home started making dinner and got REALLY sick. Where is your mom when you need her???? Far away, in another city. Once again I called Mom, and in her loving way she gave me a good reprimand and talking to about my eating habit, sleep habits and study habits, and then she offered prayer! After talking to her I drank a little tea, and ate some Chicken Noodle Soup (I made it from scratch and it was DELICIOUS, almost just like Mom's) and after a little while I started feeling better. Whew, this day has left me rather tired and emotionally spent I must say.

Oh, but let me say this too. On my way home from the grocery store I was listening to the radio and the scripture of the day was Psalm 121:

1 [A Song of degrees.] I will lift up mine eyes unto the hills, from whence cometh my help. 2 My help cometh from the LORD, which made heaven and earth. 3 He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. 4 Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep. 5 The LORD is thy keeper: the LORD is thy shade upon thy right hand. 6 The sun shall not smite thee by day, nor the moon by night. 7 The LORD shall preserve thee from all evil: he shall preserve thy soul. 8 The LORD shall preserve thy going out and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore.

I was reminded of several things. The first being that the YP2 is currently learning the song "Psalm 121:My Help" and I was greatly encouraged by it in rehearsal on Friday night. Now the idea to start teaching this song came from several things, including a thought of the day email from Pastor Jennings a couple of weeks ago, a reading of this passage of scripture at church a week or so ago, hearing a song that used the same text two weeks ago, and encouraging word from my sister last week, and receiving a recap of the Youth Jubilee. All in all, I believe God is trying to drive home the point that, if I but ask for help he'll give it. Help with what? Everything! I definitely can't do well in my theory, music or any other class without his help. Trying to do things in my own strength just begets frustration and defeat. So before I get anymore frustrated, I've decided to just ask for help of the one who can really help me. I can get tutors in the various subjects (and I might actually try), but I also believe that God can open up my understanding and help me in ways that no one else can. So at the end of the day, my frustrations have passed, because i've decided to just ask for help, in faith believing that he'll do just that.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God...

2007-09-10T18:17:00.000-07:00

Truer words have never been spoken...

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant,gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear,our presence automatically liberates others.

a return to love - marianne williamson

Why do people say the things that they say?

2007-09-09T19:18:00.000-07:00

I wonder why people think it's funny or appropriate to tell me things like, "Oh, for all I know your name might be Shaniqua."

I had someone tell me that yesterday, and I responded firmly, "No, my name is NOT Shaniqua, it's Jackie. In fact I don't know ANYONE by the name of Shaniqua!" Some people can really make foolish and ignorant comments. I guess people try to relate to what they think they know of you. Based on....what? But all they are able to see is that I'm black, so they automatically think that the only way to say hello to me is by saying "Whaaasssssuuuuuppp!" or "What-up Girl" (Yeah, he did that too). As if I am supposed to appreciate them "coming down" to my level and speaking in my simple vernacular. Why can't people simply talk to me as a person, without adding in all of their foolish idealogies and assumptions of "what I must be". I speak English, and try to not butcher it up, so very rarely I'll say things like, "Whatchall be doin..." (What do ya'll be doin). I really want to tell people, "Soooooo, when you talk to me please feel free to talk regular English, because I will understand. And if I don't understand, I'll use context clues!!!"

Or, I get this a lot. I'll tell someone I go to church, and they automatically start telling me about an experience that they've had at a "Baptist" church and how the just loved it and how the music was so good, and how it was really exciting and different and blah, blah, blah. "Hmmm...," I'd say to myself, "I don't go to a Baptist church, I don't sing the same kind of music that they sing at a Baptist church, SO, I really can't relate."

Or worse, someone asking me to give them the "Black Perspective". For instance, I had a professor one time who wanted my opinion on how I felt about Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. I really wonder what they expect me to say. Don't people realize that being "Black" is only a PART of my identity, not my total identity. So, if/when I give my perspective on ANYTHING, it usually is derived from my view of things as:

1.) A Christian
2.) A Woman
3.) A sister
4.) A Daughter
5.) A Friend
6.) A Black person
7.) An educated person
8.) An Artist

... and I can go on and on all day, listing the various aspects of "Me" that shape my perspective. First and foremost, before I can give my perspective on ANYTHING, I have to make sure it's in line with the word of God and that what i'm saying is pleasing to God's ear. Why don't people get that?

Passing the Time Away...

2007-08-30T09:16:00.000-07:00

So first, a shoutout to Dana, thanks for your comment. I'll try not to disappoint my anxious fan(s), and keep up with the updates.

So, right now i'm sitting in the Performing Arts center waiting for my voice lesson to begin. School, has been ok so far, albeit really busy. And, I must admit I have been somewhat intimidated by the Chamber Singers and Schola (Choir). As expected, there are some REALLY GOOD singers in these two groups, and they can sight read. I'm not so much intimidated by how they sing, as much as I am with their reading ability. That's definitely not my strongest suit. But, i'm sure that if i stick with it i'll be a "sight singing" expert in no time.

Ok, now I feel that I must gripe a little bit. Who in the WORLD authorized Windows Vista??? I have been so frustrated with this operating system and it's driving me crazy. None of my programs work and on top of that my documents save really funny. Actually, the document issue is more so because of Word 2007. That's annoying too! Is there anyone out there, who actually LIKES Vista? I would like to know, how you find it it useful and great and all those other things, cause i'm just annoyed!

Jackie

I Don't Want, No Knock-Off

2007-08-27T18:54:00.000-07:00

Yes, I used a double negative, but it is purely for effects. So, I was thinking today about the song "Shout To the Lord" and considering the part of the lyrics that says "...Nothing compares to the PROMISE I have in you..."

I was thinking about how many times in life you may have substitutes, other options for various products. For instance, if you can't afford a Lexus, you may opt for an Toyota. If your budget doesn't allow for the Kellog brand cereal, you opt for the Jewel or Kroger option. If you can't get a Coach or Dooney and Burke, you may opt to get the "knock-off" brand. What I'm saying is, for just about everything you need or want in life, you have options and for various reasons you may decide to compromise quality for price. There are those times too when what you opt for may be "Just as good" as the real thing, but if it's NOT the real thing, you do yourself a great injustice. So what does this have to do with Shout to the Lord?

Well, my thought is this, I don't want a knock-off promise, or a "just as good promise", I want the true, undefiled promise of God. Sometimes, the enemy will try to convince you of another way, or try to make what he's offering seem just as good, or comparable to the promise of God. At the end of the day, NOTHING, NOTHING, NOTHING compares to the promise I have in God. His promises are sure, his blessings make rich and add no sorrow, and when I am tempted and pressed beyond measure, it's the promise of God that keeps me. I heard another song this week that simply says...

"I don't mind waiting, I don't mind waiting, I don't mind waiting on the Lord.
I don't mind waiting, I don't mind waiting, I don't mind waiting on the Lord."

Profound, huh? I don't mind waiting, because the nature of God has convinced me that he's going to COME through with his promise, and nothing that offered to me other than that will be as beautiful or awesome. So, for that reason, I really don't mind waiting.

What a Week!!

2007-08-26T14:36:00.001-07:00

Hello Virtual World! So, I thought i'd take a few minutes today to chronicle my week/weekend. School started Monday, and it was very busy and tiring. I, being anxious to be in school again, took the maximum of 18 credit hours this term. Most are music classes, with the exception of an intro Computer Science course and a math course. Other than that I have choir, chamber singers (small ensemble), private voice, keyboarding, theory, music history and even a "techniques in winds" course, where I learn clarinet, sax and flute. It's a state required course for music ed majors. So last week I was running about trying to find my classes, rearrange my schedule and getting acclamated to school life again.

Midweek we had a couple of storms to come through that knocked power out in the Joliet area, during the night. Fortunately, my power was back on by the morning, though I know a few individuals whose power stayed out for longer.

Anyhoo, Thursday, I went to my morning classes, and then headed to Chicago to hang out with my family. My mom wanted to go shopping, and I thought we were going to go to a local mall, however, she had other ideas. So, Thursday afternoon I found myself in Kenosha, WI (or rather Pleasant Prairie...). CRAZY! Actually it was a nice shopping excursion although, at one point I was sitting outside of one of the stores in the outdoor malls, and the song "Material Girl" was playing (I assume that's the name of it, though I cannot be quite sure who it was buy...). I have to admit I felt a tinge of something akin to guilt. Hey, what can I say!?!?!

The good thing about this trip is that we bypassed the storm that swept through the Chicago area. According to the weather station there were storms moving @ 80 mphs, high winds, tornado watches and warnings, floods, etc... We got a little rain on our way, but we didn't experience the thunder and lightening that most of the city and surrounding suburbs received. Well, on my way back to my parents house I decided to call to see if I had lost power, due to the fact that the radio was reading off all of these warnings concerning Will County (where I live). Lo and behold, I did not have power! So i stayed at my parents and got up EARLY the next morning to make it home in time to shower and make my morning class. I made it on time, in fact I was early. However, my power was still out; I didn't have power until sometime on yesterday. Between one of classes on Friday I went home and had to throw out so much food that was not good, or that was going to go bad. What I could salvage I put into my car, along with a lot of other stuff so that I could stay at my parents over the weekend, until my parents came back home. That was a crazy experience, let me tell you!

Friday night we actually went to a "Western Style" birthday gathering for one of the brothers at the church. It was really nice, and he was thoroughly surprised. Saturday, I spent the day with Jessica and "suga mamma" (that's my own special name for Nike, noone else can call her that!), and later that evening Jordan, Jalen and a couple of Jordan's buddies came by to hang out. It was, very entertaining AND educational to say the least...

That brings us to today. We actually couldn't have church because power is still out in some parts of Joliet. So, I got home today and did some cleaning and organizing. I also set-up my newest gadget, my ION ITTUSB, it's a USB turntable. So, as I clean i've been listening to old vinyl/lp records. It's really cool that I was able to listen to "God Is So Wonderful" the recording done by the Church of God Choir from Drexel YEARS ago. I heard my late aunt, Alma Jean Roberts, singing "The Only Hope". I used to LOVE to hear her sing, I miss her sooooo much. There are a lot of other good songs on here too. Then I started listening to an old Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir CD called, "Giving Him Thanks". It has a few treasures on here too, including their cover of the Hawkins song "He's Mine All Mine" and "The Highest Praise", "More Than Love". It's so crazy that I remember the words to ALL of these songs. We used to listen to records all the time when we were children. This Brooklyn record was one of my favorites, I would get the sleeve with the printed lyrics and just sing, sing sing. It was actually created before I was born, in 1981. But still it's timeless.

The gadget works well, though there is a lot of skipping. The skipping is primarily due to the fact that these records are soooo old and dirty. Hopefully i'll be able to get them cleaned up and maybe even a few of them restored or replaced. I'm excited. The turntable came with software that I can use to actually either just listen to the records through my PC or record from the record. I'm going to try not to waste TOO much time trying to make CD's and such.

That was my week/weekend, the abbreviated version. Hope you enjoyed it!

School Starts tomorrow...

2007-08-19T17:44:00.001-07:00

So, school starts tomorrow, for like the....umpteenth time in my looooonnnnggggg college career. But I am really excited about it. I'll try to stay up to date with my blogging, and keep my small audience abreast of my experience.

On another note, my emotions have certainly run the gamut this weekend. At times I felt as if I were a fountain, overflowing because tears came so suddenly, so often and so long. :) But, I made a choice this morning that, despite..., I choose to be glad, I choose to have joy, and I choose to focus on the positive rather than the negative. I was really overwhelmed by God's goodness today, just thinking about how very greatful I am for his goodness. Yet and still, often it seems that right on the heel of a MAJOR blessing, there is a major battle that you're thrown into. One brother called it a "Decisive Battle" And boy oh boy, the battle has been RAGING, but I am so contented to just trust in God and I've decided not to let the "bitterness" of the battle, lessen my praise and excitement for the blessings God's given me.

I was thinking of the song that says...

I've been through the fire, that has deepened my desire to know the living God more and more Now it hasn't been much fun but the WORK that it has done, in my life has made it worth the hurt.

Now, sometimes we need the hard times to bring us to our knees
Otherwise we'd do as we please and never heed God
But he always knows what's best, so confident in this I rest
That he's working everything out for my good

On a lighter note, I am sooooo very excited about my apartment. I have done a little decorating, and am quite pleased with the results. I found a perfect coffee table, and two end tables this weekend for only $40! It was quite an adventure getting them into my two-door car and Clare's two-door car, but we managed, and they look stunning in my living room. I also found a REALLY nice painting at Hobby Lobby for a VERY good price. EXCITING!!!

Actually last week, I was very pleased with the effort I put forth. I gave my apartment a good thorough cleaning, including a lot of organizing. Partly because I needed it, partly because I really wanted to get it done before school started, and partly because I had people over to celebrate Clare's 23rd birthday. (Happy Birthday Clare!) The birthday was a good success, we had a couple of people over and played "Loaded Questions" and "Apples to Apples, Bible Edition". However, when it was all done I was EXTREMELY tired. Anyhoo, that's been my week/weekend/life in a nutshell. Until next time...Good bye and God bless!!!

All Things Work Together

2007-08-14T01:19:00.000-07:00

And said, By myself have I sworn, saith the LORD, for because thou hast done this thing, and hast not withheld thy son, thine only son: That in blessing I will bless thee, and in multiplying I will multiply thy seed as the stars of the heaven, and as the sand which is upon the sea shore; and thy seed shall possess the gate of his enemies; And in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed; because thou hast obeyed my voice.

So, I want to take a little time today, to share my testimony of how very grateful I am for the wonderful blessings of God. 2007 has been QUITE a year! God has been challenging me to trust him like I never have before. I’ve been encouraged to cast myself at the mercy of God and to make myself vulnerable in certain situations by exercising my faith, and trust that God was leading me to an expected end. Last year, I believe the Lord told me, in regards to a specific area in my life, to “pursue, and you will without fail recover all”. So, after being out of school for approximately one year, and having littered in my past so many disappointments and failings in regards to my college career, I decided to make that move and start the application process. This time however I was going after my passion. Timeout for trying to get a degree, JUST to say I had one. My passion was/is music, and perfecting myself as a music educator, and I was tired of holding myself back due to lack of confidence in my present ability. So, I applied at two schools Columbia College and the University of St. Francis. To make a long story short, the University of St. Francis did NOT except me because my GPA was too low at DePaul and because I needed to take a specific class. Also at the time I was working downtown Chicago, and was advised NOT to quit my job. I was instructed to work things out so that I could keep my job, and take classes in the evening or on the weekend. Not exactly what I expected. I expected God to OPEN the door and provide a way for me to go to school full-time and be able to live on my own (either off campus or on campus). Impossible, yes, but we know that with God ALL things are possible.

Why did i have NERVE, the AUDACITY to think such a thing? Well, I was sitting on the bus one day fretting about how things were going to work out and God brought to my mind the passage of scripture that says, Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[b]? 26Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest? "Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today, and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, how much more will he clothe you, O you of little faith!
Well, I looked out of the window of the bus, and there on the grass in Grant Park were these black crows. They were just going about their morning business, digging for worms and scavenging for food. Ok, so they weren’t RAVENS, but it was a black bird, so it caught my attention. And I started thinking about a time previously when I had received a bunch of Lilies for my birthday. The year previously one of my bosses had given me Lilies, and thus began my love for them. They are such a strong, fragrant and beautiful flower. Around the time I received the flowers, I was at a point in my job where I was feeling that I had missed a few opportunities for promotion, but I was also feeling like I need to move up. In fact one of my former co-workers informed me, that the reason she was hesitant to apply for a certain job was because she felt for sure that I would be applying. Well, the thought never even CAME to me to apply, until after someone was already occupying the position. And knowing how our department was run, I was SURE that it would be a long time that a promotion would come available that would be a sensible move for me. I felt as if I had missed and opportunity, but at the same time I told the Lord, "God, I don't want to be and Admin for the rest of my life." Not that there is anything wrong with being an administrative assistant, I felt i needed a bit more of a challenge. No sooner than I had made my request know to God, in fact that same afternoon, I found out that one of co-workers was leaving and I had an opportunity to move into her vacated position. Well, I believe that God used Lilies to let me know that he would take care of me (at that time the same scripture came to mind about consider the Lilies). Well, anyhow, that day on the bus I was SO encouraged, and could see in my minds eye myself working in the field that it looked like he was going to open for me. And I just KNEW he was going to work things out so that I could just focus on school without distraction. Well, as I said before, when I sought counsel on the matter I was told to NOT quit my job, but to try to work my school schedule around my work schedule. Although I did not see how I could be successful and do that, I decided to just simply obey counsel. And so I did.

The first semester at Columbia College came and went and was a complete disaster. My schedule was as follows, Monday through Friday, work ALL day, Saturday classes were from 10 am until 6 pm, Sunday church was an ALL DAY affair, my church/choir duties increased. Needless to say, half way through the semester I burned out, I mean completely choked. And you know what I did? I QUIT! Halfway through, I just stopped! I felt as if I could NOT go on any further, and gave in to my feelings and stopped. I had disappointed myself ANOTHER time. ANOTHER TIME, I did not have what it took to get the job done. Talk about frustration. I mean, all this time I’ve been saying that this was the opportunity I had been waiting for, only to get to that point and fail again? I was so discouraged.

Now, on top of this I was working and desiring, and mainly feeling like it was time for me to move out on my own. I had so many PERFECT living arrangements and opportunities in my hand that seemed to slip through as “grains of sand”. And to add to it, things at the job were getting PRETTY scary. While my boss was out on maternity leave, I had to take on new responsibility and maintain my regular work. WOW! October through December 2006, I faced so many disappointing situations, and honestly, looking back I don't know how I made it out with even HALF of my right mind.

Well, 2007 dawned. And I had to once again, find courage to get up and try again. The enemy was there, just like the song says “Reminding me of all the times I’d tried before and failed. The waves they keep on telling me time and time again, GIRL, you’ll NEVER WIN. You’ll NEVER WIN!” Why even try again? Why? I was embarrassed, disappointed, discouraged, and was FEELING (please understand the operative word is "FEELING") like I was only going to fail again. (Don't get scared now, there is some victory to come!) Well, through my tears and disappointments, I decided to get up and try another time. It wasn’t with a happy and gleeful heart, nor can I say I had all the confidence in the world. I told myself, I was going to try it just ONE more time. And if this time fails, I’ll give it up.
Ok, now my mind is made up to try again, but I find that I have the problem of lack of funds. Lord! What to do??? Well, I remember going out one day during my lunch to get my hair done, and on my way back I took a cab. Now, it is very rare that you find a black woman cab driver in Chicago, but that’s what I got that day. I got into the cab, and she was listening to the local gospel station, and of the few songs i liked was on. So i sat there and kind of hummed along to the song as we made the short trip back to the office. Upon arrival and before getting out of the cab the lady turns to me and says, “I have a word from the Lord. When you get a chance read…” It must have been Luke 12 or a corresponding chapter in one of the other Gospels (you know how the Gospels kind of repeat each other a little…). All I know is that when I got back to my office, I read the chapter and it was the same thing God had told me that day on the bus, when he told me to pursue and promised to take care of me. So, I sat in my office and prayed that the Lord give me direction. And he did, he told me EXACTLY how to get the funds. I thought for a moment that it was a looooongggg shot. I thought for SURE it would not work out, but I decided to "try the spirit", and if the Lord says do it this way, well I’m going to do it that way. And when I did my part, he did his. So, back to school I went, more resolved and determined than ever. This time I worked hard, and when I got to the point where I was feeling the burn out and like giving up I PRESSED over it. I kept striving.
Not only was I back in school, but God had opened a door for me to move out on my own. Now, I must say that this is one of the first times where I had to make a big decision, full aware that my parents did not totally agree. But, God was telling me to MOVE. The way things worked out, was TOTALLY God. I was willing and able to surrender it, but GOD made a way, when I had no way. So, I moved out to Joliet, while working and going to school in Chicago. Talk about a challenge and an expensive challenge at that.
I felt the pressure, but God sustained me. After working HARD all semester, I came to the end and that dreadful word, FINALS! And right at finals, things got crazy. I just did NOT have the proper time to study like I needed to. I studied as much as I could and armed with faith I went and took my finals. Would you believe, the very first final I took was in Music theory, the class that related to my major, the class that I had invested so much time in, I completely FAILED the first part of the test. The test was two parts, one written and one performance. Completely bombed it! I walked out so frustrated, almost to the point where I didn't even want to TAKE the final in the second class, because I DEFINITELY felt that I did not have the command of that material. As I walked to the other building I’m feeling like giving up again. I’m feeling like, things are just as they were before. EVERY TIME I try, I FAIL! Why do I keep trying???

Well, I guess I had enough of giving into my feelings so, I decided to press over my feelings and take the other final. I'll have you know that I passed with flying colors. Well a few days later I had to take the second part of the final that I had previously failed. My first inclination, as you probably figured out by now, was to skip the second part altogether. I felt that the second part was so EASY that it could not possibly be weighted enough to make a difference to my test grade, let alone my overall grade. But, I’ve been focusing on myself lately. Getting rid of the OLD me, and where at one point I would have given in to my inclination, my challenge was to keep STRIVING!!! I had been working so hard on exercising faith in God, to do the seemingly impossible. So I did. And you know what happened? I PASSED. As it turns out, the second part saved my grade! I escaped with an A and a B+ in my classes.
Well, thank God for that victory, but the battle wasn’t over. While striving so hard to do well in school, and due to other complications, things at work had begun to crumble. At one point, I KNEW that a case was being built up against me, but because they would not communicate with me, I just had to sit back and watch the wall is it was built. There were times when I wanted to say something, but I felt the Holy Spirit tell me to wait. The trouble had actually started the fall of ’06, and had really begun to build up between March-May ’07. I tell you for a certainty, some people meant things for my evil, but God meant it for my good. I just waited on God. There were times when I felt the pressure and I was like, “I need to find a new job.” But at one point God told me, stop even sending out resumes, and NOT to quit my job. So I obeyed and continued to wait. Well, as it turned out our company went through a merger and my position got eliminated. I am so happy that I waited on God. Why, you may ask, seeing as how I was laid off anyway? Well, if I had just quit I would not be in the timing that God had ordained for me, more than likely I would have been stuck at a job that caused me much misery and pain. Kind of like, creating an Ishmael, because I was unwilling to wait on Israel, the promise of God. Also, I would not have been eligible for the severance and payouts that I received. So, anyway, my last day of work was June 30th.
This is just bringing you to where I am today. Prior to being laid off I had been watching a certain website www.meritmusic.org for jobs. They are a community music school that offers QUALITY music education to under-privileged youth at little to no cost. TOTALLY WHAT I WANT TO DO EVENTUALLY. Well anyway, in fall of ’06 I was sent a job posting from their website that I did not apply for, because I felt that I did not have enough credentials for the position. So, for lack of confidence I did not capitalize on the opportunity. Well, after I missed that opportunity I regretted it and started going faithfully to the site to look for positions. I had started going EVERYDAY around April and May of this year. And the day that I found out that I would lose my job, I sent to the website and lo and behold, WOW, the very position that I had passed up last year, was available again. So, I applied. While trembling and a little doubtful, but resolved, I applied. That’s when the torture really began. All of my old fears and skepticism begin to rise up. Well, I had to settle it and settle it, I did. I let God know that I DID want that job, but if he decided NOT to give it to me I was still going to praise him. I had CONFIDENCE that if it were for me that it would come to pass, and if not then he had something greater for me. And if something greater did not come until 10 years down the line, I STILL love the Lord and am willing to follow you and serve you without bitterness. And shortly thereafter I got a call for my first interview. I interviewed and they told me that they’d call, if I had been selected for the second interview. About a week went by, and I was called in for the second interview, that I thought went MUCH better than the first. Now, let me tell you, on the first interview I went and completely fell in love with the facility, with the mission and I could actually see myself working there. Not only that, the time in which I would be able to start was perfect. It looked as if I would be able to take like 2 weeks off, attend the jubilee and then start my new job. The pay was considerably less than what I had been accustomed to making, but after a small struggle I submitted that to God and resolved to just keep faith in God that he would work it out, according to his will. Well, I waited, and waited. The time came and went in which they had promised to call concerning their final answer. So you know what I had to do in the meantime, SUBMIT IT TO GOD. I could not allow myself to fret, because even though I felt that it was mine, I had to consider that it may be in the mind of God to choose to go in a different direction. During that time, my heart was encouraged by the song that says “But if he chooses not to move, in the way I’ve prayed he would. I’m confident that it’s working all together for my good, and I will stand upon his word for he is able.” The time was drawing near for my departure from AHA, and I had hoped that I would leave them with something else in my hand. But it was not to be. But you know what happened, a few days before my last day; my dear wonderful mother went out to the farmer’s market and brought me back some flowers. Guess what kind? Lilies!!! She did it without really knowing what kind of flower it was, and how amazingly special they are to me. Well, that’s all I needed to know and be encouraged that God would take care of me. My last day came and went and that weekend I took a nice trip to OHIO, enjoyed a cool museum, went to a wedding, visited the saints and enjoyed the good Word of God while I was there. The Monday that I returned I finally got my call. They had selected someone else for the position. I cried, and was disappointed, but I did NOT charge God, foolishly. I had to submit my will and yield to him, again.
A few weeks went by, and I was sending out resumes and looking for jobs, only to be disappointed. I got turned down for a Receptionist position. I absolutely could NOT believe it, with all of my experience and education, I was turned down for a RECEPTIONIST position. Now that didn’t make me feel very good, but again, I had to yield myself to God’s control. Well, one day, I went back to the “Merit Music” website, and there was another position. You would think I had learned my lesson right? Well, I thought about it and said, “Hey, what do I have to lose?” So I applied for that position as well. I do believe that it was God’s will for me to apply, but not so that I would get the job, but as an act of faith. I was willing to make myself vulnerable to another "no" and live with it.
But then God quietly whispered to me, “Jackie, I know you want to work at Merit, because you HAVE to work somewhere and Merit is the ideal place for what you want to do. But what is your ultimate request, what is it that you REALLy want? If you could have one thing what would it be?”Well, Lord, my ultimate request has never really changed. Though I knew I didn’t deserve it, and though it may not really be necessary or feasible in the eyes of some people, I still desired, above all else to have an opportunity to focus on school. My earnest desire was to be able to go to school full-time without feeling the pressure of a full-time job and running here and there. I realize that I’m not a teen anymore, and that I’ve missed that critical time in my life to go to school unburdened, but if you could work it out, I would be ever so grateful.
Then I started thinking, “Where should I go Lord?” I was enrolled at Columbia, so I figured that was the place where he wanted me to be. But also, I knew that at Columbia, I would only be able to get a music performance degree and then after obtaining that I would have to go elsewhere to get my teaching certification, etc… Also, by this time I living in Joliet, and I was still considering if I were to find a job in or around Joliet, I would need to be in a comfortable distance from my school, so that it would not be difficult to take evening classes. On the flipside, what happens if I find a job in Chicago, and I’ve already made the move to a school in Joliet? And to top it all St. Francis denied me last year, who’s to say that they will accept me now? Where will the money come from?
Lord, I had TOO many questions. Well, what happened was, while I was still THINKING about it, I got an email from the head of the Music Department at USF. I hadn’t talked to him in @ a year’s time, since like March of ’06. And he wanted to know if I were interested in attending the University of St. Francis. I didn’t know what to say, so by faith I told him, yes I was. Still not sure of how things would work out. Well, over the last couple of weeks, I’ve met with him and Clarice (my old voice teacher from High School, who just happend to be at USF and who also helped to develop the music program there) and was informed that they would be glad to have me in their music program. Well praise the Lord! Only, I hadn’t been accepted in the school yet. But according to my faith, I started looking for school money.One day, I was on my way home the Lord spoke quietly to me “try this”. I was very skeptical, because it was not my first choice as to getting funds, and secondly I thought for sure the answer would be a big fat NO! But, once again, I decided to try the spirit. I’m going to throw myself out on the mercy of God, and if it’s his desire it would come to pass. Well I tried it and much to my surprise, the answer was YES! WHAT!?!?!?!!? Now I just had to wait to see if I get accepted. Well, I got my call and letter that I had been accepted into the school. I start next week! What does this mean? God has turned my situation around and given me the desire of my heart. For at least one semester, I’ll be able to go to school, keep my apartment and my car, and not have to slave away at someone’s job. Glory to God! And you know what my confidence is, if he can do it for one semester, he can do it again and again and again until I graduate. And greater still, if he doesn’t, I can EXPECT him to do greater than what I can ask and think if I am only willing and to trust and obey. I am soooooo excited about the good things God is doing my life. He told me, he was going to give me an expected end, and I’m so glad I held fast to confidence and waited and trusted in God.

I am also glad for the lessons i've learned during this trial. Would you like to know one of the biggest lessons i've learned? That "feelings" do not always speak the truth. Our feelings are ALWAYS speaking to us and trying to dictate to us how we should respond in certain situations. But thank God for truth and faith! When my feelings, are contrary to what God wants me to believe, I can overlook them and simply launch out on God and see him make a way.

Also, I (we) have what the world calls "failings" in my past, but I don't have to live there. I can remember the events of my past, but I certainly can't live in the past and let the past orchestrate my present or my future. And sometimes, what we see as "failings" God sees as part of his plan. I cannot measure my experience or my life according to the world's standards or even according to the standards of my parents or of my closest friends. I just want to know, "Right now Lord, am I in the center of your will?" If so, then I am content to dwell here. Knowing that my life is in your hands, my future is in your hands and that you are not through with me yet. There is still so much to be written to the life of Jacqueline A. Larry, and by God's grace I'm going to see this story until the end.

Sing 'Til All the Clouds Remove

2007-08-14T00:16:00.000-07:00

There are times, when you don't FEEL joy. What do you do then?

Sing my soul and all within me
Sing till all the clouds remove
Sing, and praise and shout forever
That the Lord our God is Love

My Life Is In Your Hands

2007-07-30T23:43:00.000-07:00

I am learning, though I suppose i've always known it in my heart, that life can be quite unpredictable. I turned 25 on June 12, and boy my life feels and looks a lot different that what I expected it to be at 25, when I was 15 years old...or for that matter 20 years old.

This year has been a somewhat a whirlwind of landmark events. February 2007, I made that giant step (at least it was for me) to move out on my own. After teeter tottering on the shore of indecision and uncertainty for so long, I finally decided (through counsel of course) to make the big lunge. Sink or swim, do or die, has been my motto in 2007, and boy oh boy, it's been certainly a trial of my faith.

Anyhoo, so I moved out on my own, and absolutely LOVE it. I can't even express how nice it is to have my OWN place. My very own peaceful habitation. It's not huge, or gorgeous or anything like that, but it is mine.

Also, I decided to start my music studies, officially and whole-heartedly at Columbia College. Actually I had started going in Fall 2006, but there were complications and a few setbacks that I endured, so I say my real studies began in January. Wow, a lot of changes, right? I was taking the train between Joliet and Chicago almost everyday, except on the evenings when I had late classes and I was driving into Chicago or staying at my parents. New school, new place, new (longer) commute? NO PROBLEM!

RIIIIGGGHTTT!!! Then things started getting weird at work. One word for you:MERGER. Oh yeah, we went through a merger and long story short, I lost my JOB. I have been officially unemployed since June 30th. Since that time i've had job prospects come through and then dissipate. Including one job at a well known community music school, that looked very promising. I mean it got so close that I was called in for interview #2, one of only 3 canidates that received a callback. I thought for sure God had set this aside for me. I mean the timing in which I saw the posting, and received my call for first and second interviews seemed perfect. It seemed to be on of those divine appointments one of those situations that only God could orchestrate and ordain. Only to have it all end in, someone else knew how to use RAISER's EDGE getting the job. A computer program! Something I could probably learn to use in one day, was my downfall. Well, needless to say I was disappointed. I still can barely wrap my mind around that one, but perhaps it's not for me to understand. The Lord works in mysterious ways, his wonders to perform.

Well, my faith says that he's working wonders anyway, though my eyes have yet to behold the manifestation of his works. So, I guess this goes back to my original statement. 25 is not at all looking the way I thought it would look. I'm still chasing that ever elusive B.A., unemployed, obviously unmarried and unfamil(ied) (those two are TOTALLY in God's hands)... and if i thought hard enough I'm sure I could add a few more things to this list. So, in a nutshell, no i'm not quite where I expected to be when I was a teenager, but I am still SOOOOOOOOO blessed. I can honestly say that God has been good to me. I have more now that i've EVER had in my life. It was my desire to move out before I turned 25, and God has blessed me to obtain (and maintain) that goal. God blessed me with a nice car, and the wherewithal to maintain it. He's blessed me above all, to stay saved and increased my desire to know him more. He's made me glad. Through all this, I can honestly say I am not depressed or worried, and I know that's more than what the world can say about their problems. I am truly happy with my life and all that God has done for me. AND i don't think God's done with me yet. I really believe that this is just the beginning for me. I have a whole lifetime to live, if God allows and i'm determined to make the best of it. I've been quoting to myself lately a very popular scripture...

"Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus.
Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,
press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus."

I totally can't do a thing about my past. Whether the circumstances that brought me to this place were of my own doing, like a personal failure or setback or if I'm here because of someone else, or because this is just God's plan for me (this around the way, off the beaten path ...). I don't have time or energy to sit and focus on the past, or on what I don't have. I have not attained all, neither am I already perfect, but I keep following Christ so that I may obtain all the things in my life that Christ ordained to give me when he saved me from my sins. But this requires me to forget, to reach and press and to just submit my life into the hands of the one who can help me obtain and attain all. Of course, I have a song that I think sums up my feelings regarding my situation right now. My life is in God's hands, and clearly he has his own ideas for what I should do and be. I said it when I got it (you can look back at old posts on this very same blog) that I know God gave me my job, and my promotion. Psalm says that "Promotion is from the Lord". But the word also says that the Lord giveth and he taketh away, blessed be the name of the Lord. So I say thank you Lord for the time spent at AHA, thank for for all the things I learned, all the people I met, all the opportunities I had, for the promotion, for proving to me that you're really all the credintials I need. So i'm resolved to keep this song resonating in my heart that...

"My life is in your hands

My heart is in your keeping

I'm never without hope

Not when my future is with you

My life is in your hands

And though I may not see clearly

I will lift my voice and sing

Cause your love does amazing things

Lord, I know, my life is in your hands"

Be Blessed!

More Nike

2007-07-30T23:29:00.000-07:00

My dear sweet Nike Faith is now 7 months and quite the charmer. I'm totally enamored with her, and have plans to kidnap her in January. Don't worry, Jessica knows and agrees but we'll have to work on Daddy David. So I thought I would post a few updated photos. These are my favorites.

The first is our "grown up" little lady Nike. I actually bought the Nike (pronounced NIGH-key) outfit, because I thought it was cute. When I showed Jenny she was like "Hey, that has her name on it." Nike, pronounced KNEE-KAY.

According to mommy, this is her "Pick me up PLEASE" face.

Oh man! This is why I fell in love!

My Heart Says Amen

2007-05-22T06:49:00.000-07:00

So, what do you do when you've prayed in a very specific way, for a very specific answer or move of God, and he seems to be moving in the OPPOSITE direction of what you've asked for? When i'm tempted to murmur and complain and feel sorry for myself because things seem to not be working out in my favor, I just start singing this song. I REFUSE to dwell on the negative prospects, because at this point I don't know how he's going to turn these things around for my good. So I sing "My Heart Says Amen to thy will..." until all doubt is dispelled and my will is truly humbled before God and until I come to a place of acceptance with joy! Well, please, read along, sing-a-long and be blessed!

I have yielded myself to Thy service,

And Thy presence my bosom doth fill;

O my Savior, I haste to obey Thee,

And my heart says amen to Thy will.

Refrain:Yes, my heart says amen to Thy will, Lord,

And I know that Thou lovest me still;

While I bow low in humble submission,

And my heart says amen to Thy will.

All the heart-ties of earth my be sundered,

So that I may Thy purpose fulfill;

Help me gladly submit and not murmur,

Ever saying amen to Thy will.

Though my plans and my hopes may seem blighted,

I will love Thee and trust in Thee still;

For I know all is well that Thou doest,

And my heart says amen to Thy will.

When I pass to that heavenly country,

And my soul with its glory doth thrill;

This forever shall be my rejoicing,

That my heart said amen to Thy will.

NIKE

2007-05-02T11:55:00.000-07:00

My Favorite Nike (Oyenike) photos! Here she is, that beautiful girl!

Oyenike Faith Oladapo

2007-01-09T20:42:00.000-08:00

So, needless to say, she's here!!! She's actually been here 3 weeks already (4 weeks on Saturday). It has been a pretty exciting time, I am absolutely in LOVE because she's such a sweet heart. I'll be adding pictures; please feel free to admire them whole-heartedly. :)

Today, a good day

2006-12-07T20:00:00.000-08:00

So I had a good day today. Actually the day is what you make of it, good or bad, it's all in perception. I bought a new hat and glove set, from Target. I LOVE TARGET!! I could probably go to Target like, everyday, and be soo very happy. I also bought this scrumptious Starbucks IceCream bar thingy. Mmmmmm....

Well, that's all I had to say. I better head off to bed now, tomorrow is another day. Keep smiling everybody!

Blogging

2006-12-05T18:53:00.000-08:00

So, i'm thinking that maybe I need to come up with a theme for my blog. So far, it's just been random, and severly sporadic thoughts; perhaps the public would be better served if i picked a topic of interest and be faithful to it. Eh? What do you think?

Antihoos, until I get my thoughts together, I'll continue along the "random vain". :)

I have discovered that I am a football fan! I'm not into sports much, but I really like football. I think the "monsters of the midway" have a little something to do with that. Jalen has really been schooling me on who's who and what's what in football. (He's a very informed 11 year old, I must say). Antiways, we've had several bonding moments through the Bears victories and defeats. The first being the down to the wire, nail-biting, hair-raising Bears vs Cards. WHEW! Talk about exciting. I was almost praying for the Bears (I SAID ALMOST!!). Anyways, I'm kind of getting into this football thing.

Other news on the home front, Jessica still doesn't have the baby. God has really blessed her to come a loooonnnggg way. About 6 or 7 months ago it seemed that she would lose the baby, now it seem the baby is as comfortable as ever and will NEVER come! But, I'm glad that she was able to carry the little one full-term. Thank God for his mercy!!! I can hardly wait to meet little Miss Oyenike Faith, thank God she'll be here soon! I having a feeling this little girl is going to be spoiled rotten. I nearly have to clench my wallet when I go into stores. All I need to see is a glance of pink fabric and...whew...i'm sucked in! :) "Temperance, temperance," is what I tell myself, "she'll be here for the rest of her life. You'll have PLENTY of times to spoil her." Well I can hardly wait!!!!!

I guess that's about it for now, nothing much left to say. Thanks for stopping by!!!

Things are not always what they seem...

2006-11-26T14:17:00.000-08:00

I have been so impressed with that thought lately, that men look on the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart. Consider the Matthew Henry commentary on 2 Corinthians 10:7. In my estimation it's talking about the church and how we should labor with one another and be considerate of one another. The poor, the uneducated, the mentally challenged, those who are weak in faith, and I would even say those who may have been "overtaken in a fault" we are to treat with kindness and love. I guess my thought is more of a spinoff from my other post, because after thinking about it I realized that I need the mind of Christ in so many ways. There are so many people being discriminated against and I can't have the victim's mindset always thinking about myself and how I'm being "mistreated" and be blind to my own possibilities of showing partiality. Partiality to whom? The person who dresses the nicest, or has the nicest home or car, or who seems to be most spiritual or popular. You get my drift. Antiways...that's just my thought.

2 Corinthians 10:7 KJV

Do ye look on things after the outward appearance? if any man trust to himself that he is Christ's, let him of himself think this again, that, as he is Christ's, even so are we Christ's.

2 Corinthians 10:7 NIV

7You are looking only on the surface of things. If anyone is confident that he belongs to Christ, he should consider again that we belong to Christ just as much as he.

His relation to Christ: If any man trust to himself that he is Christ's, even so are we Christ's, v. 7. It would seem by this that Paul's adversaries boasted of their relation to Christ as his ministers and servants. Now the apostle reasons thus with the Corinthians: "Suppose it to be so, allowing what they say to be true (and let us observe that, in fair arguing, we should allow all that may be reasonably granted, and should not think it impossible but those who differ from us very much may yet belong to Christ, as well as we), allowing them," might the apostle say, "what they boast of, yet they ought also to allow this to us, that we also are Christ's." Note, 1. We must not, by the most charitable allowances we make to others who differ from us, cut ourselves off from Christ, nor deny our relation to him. For, 2. There is room in Christ for many; and those who differ much from one another may yet be one in him. It would help to heal the differences that are among us if we would remember that, how confident soever we may be that we belong to Christ, yet, at the same time, we must allow that those who differ from us may belong to Christ too, and therefore should be treated accordingly. We must not think that we are the people, and that none belong to Christ but ourselves. This we may plead for ourselves, against those who judge us and despise us that, how weak soever we are, yet, as they are Christ's, so are we: we profess the same faith, we walk by the same rule, we build upon the same foundation, and hope for the same inheritance.

Deception...

2006-11-20T17:53:00.000-08:00

Human beings, in my estimation, are so very good at treating symptoms and ignoring the bigger picture. We do it with our health, our finances, our spiritual lives, etc... Just take a look at how successful pharmaceautical companies have become in the last two decades. Our body gets worn down and ill because we don't get enough rest, we don't eat the right things, and we don't exercise enough. BUT when our body gets sick (which is the symptom to tell us something is wrong) we take drugs, pills, medicines, pain relievers and so on and so on. Why? Because we aren't interested in letting our body heal. We just want a quick fix to relieve the pain so that we can continue in our bad habits. I believe God, being the intelligent creator that he is, programmed our body to give us hints when it need a rest. Just like our cars give us signals when they need maintenance, so does our bodies. A headache, a stomach ache, a pain here and there is usually indicative of a more serious issue. Usually the issue can be rectified by rest and giving the body sufficient time to go through it's natural healing process. Our bodies can be healed through changing our live habits by eating right and exercising. Making life changes is what will help us to live healthier lives; taking medicines will only ease the pain for a while, but it cannot HEAL our bodies. And even in taking medicines and prescribed drugs usually the side affects are so extreme, you wonder if the side affects will cause you more discomfort than the actual pain or issue you are currently experiencing. But, we, as members of the human race, do not like to be inconvenienced in the least bit. We'd rather cover the symptoms than to take time and make the changes to be healed. So sad. So, my little tirade really isn't about living healthy as much as it is about setting the stage to prove how we think. I believe how we treat our body epitomizes how we treat just about everything else in life. What really got me going was an article I read about a certain comedian who hurled racial slurs at inviduals in an audience recently. It's so sad that as a country we seem to think that passing a few laws, moving legislation would really be enough to change the hearts of ignorant, misinformed, malicious, hardened individuals who refuse to acknowledge that a man's (or woman's) character TRULY is NOT based on the color of their skin. Not that I am not glad for legislation that has been passed, or that I am ungrateful for the sacrifices that have been made that allows me, an opportunity to receive education and career opportunities that 50 years ago would been difficult and perhaps impossible for me to reach (Civil Rights Act of 1964). I realize though that it was GOD's mercy that allowed me and my family, the generations before me, to overcome various obstacles and arrive to the land we hold today. I realize that it is because of HIS mercy that we (myself and my family members) were not consumed. It's pretty amazing that the great-grandaughter of slaves is able to go to college and able to hold a professional position that demands respect and dignity. But what I am saying is that the legislation passed did little to address the serious illness that plagues the hearts of people throughout America. Racial hatred and bigotry is SIN and is wrong in God's eyes. I don't care who it is, how rich they are, white, black, hispanic, asian, NOONE is exempt. It really makes me angry when I read articles about some public person using their position (or abusing in many cases) to air their bigotry. I hate that people are so in their closed/sealed houses and so ignorant of other people that they readily accept thoughts and opinions about an ENTIRE group of people just based on one or two people they have met. I am no longer surprised when it happens though. From time to time you'll here people say, "I can't believe that in 2006 things like....still happen..." Well, I can believe it and it saddems me. Not until people make a conscience choice to change their hearts and look beyond what they see with their eyes will we ever break down walls.

I know i've been in several instances where I've felt like a person of a different race saw only one thing, "my skin color". And it makes me kind of sad, because I think to myself, "If they could only see beyond that, they'll find out that there's so much more to me than meets the eye." We did this exercise one time in college where we had to write down how we would describe ourselves, more or less, write a list of ways to describe who we are. And I realized that I can come up with so many things on my list that I could share with others of different races and different ethnic backgrounds. If we would only give each other a chance...

Ok, i put up my soapbox...

I'm Back!

2006-08-22T20:45:00.000-07:00

So, we're back from good ole Martin, TN. We were able to help transport some of Jordan's stuff to Carbondale, we saw his room, saw his roommate, then headed on our way to Martin.

What a wonderful time I had! Service on Friday night was excellent as were the Sunday services. And then it was just awesome being with the saints. It's amazing how salvation is the common denominator or the great equalizers. There we were with people who two years ago we didn't really know at all, now it seems like I've known them all my life. Salvation has a way of bringing people together and I love it!

So today I had to return to work, that was a mess! I was sooo tired, and just generally not interested in being there. So sad :(. But I made it all the way through till 5 pm. Hopefully tomorrow will be a little better.

That's about it for now, it's about time i turned in! Thanks for stopping by.

Praise Report

2006-08-14T19:56:00.000-07:00

Hello faithful viewers! I know it's been a while since I've updated, but as usual I've been keeping a pretty hectic schedule. There was VBS, and rehearsals to attend, Jordan's Trunk Party, and just every day life. But all is well.

I do have a "PRAISE REPORT"! Thank God for his healing power and virtue. So last week I woke up on Thursday morning with a rather odd pain in my right ankle. At first I thought it was the regular morning stiffness, but as I started moving around in preparation of work I noticed that the main was intensifying. So, I went on to work and my foot/ankle was pained ALL day. By the end of the day I was miserable! It was so odd because I had no idea what I had done that had caused this pain. So i called the doctor's office and after waiting for 30 minutes to talk to the nurse, they basically told me to take an aspirin and put ice on my foot. She also suggested that I come into the "Walk-In Center" because the doc might want to take some xrays, just in case some serious damage had been done. So after work Jen drove me to the doctor's office. To make a long story short, they didn't take x-rays and they prescribed me medicine (surprise! surprise!) and sent me on my merry way. I was still in a LOT of pain. I decided not to take the medicine, mainly because I didn't see the point; if it were a sprain I would just have to endure the pain until my foot healed itself. The medicine wouldn't "heal" whatever it was anyway, it would just mask the pain.

Anyhoo, I went to work on Friday and it was still REALLY sore and paining me. After work, it was our first rehearsal (after a few months) for the Young People choir, so i had to go to Joliet. By the time I got home Friday night my foot was in a lot of pain. The pain lasted all night into the next day. Saturday, I got up and tried to go about doing my several tasks (mainly laundry), and was having a difficult time because I could not really walk on my foot. The pain lasted well into the early evening. When I could hardly bear the pain anymore I bowed my head and asked God if he could take away the pain. I knew I had so much to do, and so little time to do it (Saturday's go so quickly, and next thing you know it's Monday and BACK TO WORK!). Do you know that God completely healed the pain in my ankle!! It was amazing to me. Gradually the pain went away. By the evening it was almost as if the pain was never there! Then words to the song came to my mind, that says "Oh, what peace we often forfeit. Oh, what NEEDLESS PAIN WE BEAR! All because we do not carry, everything to God in prayer."

Isn't it the truth. We'd rather grin and bear things, grit our teeth and try to outlast the pain, rather then just taking it to God in prayer. What a valuable lesson I learned from the almighty God!

In other news, the weekend will be here before you know it and we'll be taking Jordan off to school. He's going to Southern Illinios University, Carbondale (SIUC). It's been really something seeing him pack up all his stuff, getting ready to leave. I REALLY hope he does well, it will be my constant prayer (second only to the prayer that he be saved!). Anyhoo, we're going down to Carbondale on Friday, and after a few of us are going on to visit some saints in TN. That should be exciting. I'm actuallay glad to be able to get away.

Speaking of Jordan going away, he got some pretty cool stuff! One of our neighbors and her daughter bought him an IPOD!!! For real! And a 30 gift card for i-tunes. I'm like, wow! Cool!!! I won't be envious, but I am really impressed. (I want an ipod!!!) That was the most cool gift he received, but the saints really bought him a lot of nice, practical items.

AND! Speaking of school, I resume my courses at Columbia College on September 5th. (OH BOY!) I'm looking forward to it. I really believe God is giving me an opportunity to finish my degree and I am ever so thankful. That's another testimony in itself of how God has worked things out on my behalf. I selected my final courses today. It will be challenging because, for the time being, I have to maintain a full time schedule at work. However I was able to take classes on Monday evening as well as Saturday morning and afternoon. So it doesn't conflict with church or work. So thank God for that.

Well, that's about all that's going on in my life. If anything interesting should happen i'll be sure to stop by and let ya'll know! Until then, keep the faith!

Untitled

2006-08-04T06:57:00.000-07:00

Well i'm back. It's been quite something the last few days. Let's recap...

We had Vacation Bible School every night last week (except Thursday because there was a really bad storm). Though it was physically challenging (keeping up that busy schedule), it was a lot of fun.

I had a few days off of work. I was off on Friday, Monday and Tuesday of this week. My poor sister is on complete bedrest for the time being. She has to for the sake of the little one growing inside of her. So I took a few days off and went to her house and sat with her to keep her company. Tuesday night I made "creamy" alfredo from the box, which actually turned out to be something more like "clumpy" alfredo. Poor girl had to throw the stuff out, and ate 2 plums instead. And what's sad is that it was Pasta Roni! :0 Next time i'll do better, I promise.

So it's Friday and I'm glad. Even after having off 5 consecutive days, I'm still beat! We have choir rehearsal tonight and then I have to rush home and help with chores around the house. Tomorrow we're hosting a "trunk/going away party" for Jordan at our house. Yes sir, just a few more weeks and he'll be off to Carbondale, IL! I certainly hope he does well.

Ok, so I think that's about it for now. I have a lot of work to get done today before I leave, so i'm gonna hop to it.

Jackie

A Good Day...

2006-07-17T13:13:00.000-07:00

Today is a good day, i'm alive, i'm saved, and all is well! I also had the day off work, which is very nice. :)

Yep, Dana, I am a blogger! Not a very good one, because i go through blogging "spurts" and have not been as faithful as I thought I would be. But we'll see, perhaps it will get better.

Actually, sometimes I don't really have much to say, my life is pretty...boring...uneventful. Which is not a bad thing, it's just a thing. Like today, I got to sleep in a little bit. I got up and kind of meandered around for a bit. I talked to LuJodia on the phone for a while and now i'm doing some much needed cleaning/organizing. Nothing to out of the ordinary, but I am thankful to God for that. I like being a minimum drama type of girl. :)

Well anyhoo, that's about it for now. I'll be back to tell my faithful viewers if anything important takes place!

How Firm a Foundation

2006-07-14T09:44:00.000-07:00

So, here's another thought that I had last week. This is one of my favorite hymns, i hope it blesses you like it blessed me!

So I was talking to one of the sisters today and this song came to my mind. It completely blessed my soul, especially verse 4. There are times when God will ALLOW waters to rise about us, and then there are times when the enemy will come in like a flood; but what about those times when he CALLS us into deep waters? He knowingly sends us through trouble, affliction or hard times but our consolation is that the "rivers of woe (we usually say sorrow) will not overflow". Thank God for his power that is able to lift us up OVER the troubled sea! So, read through the song, sing the song, concentrate on the words and see if you don’t receive a blessing!

Psalm 61 “From the end of the earth will I cry unto thee, when my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.”

Job 28:10-12 He putteth forth his hand upon the rock; he overturneth the mountains by the roots. He cutteth out rivers among the rocks; and his eye seeth every precious thing. He bindeth the floods from overflowing; and the thing that is hid bringeth he forth to light.

Isaiah 43:1-2 1But now thus saith the LORD that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine. When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.

“How Firm A Foundation” Click Here To Listen to the midi

How firm a foundation, ye saints of the Lord,Is laid for your faith in His excellent Word!
What more can He say than to you He hath said,You, who unto Jesus for refuge have fled?

In every condition, in sickness, in health;In poverty’s vale, or abounding in wealth;
At home and abroad, on the land, on the sea,As thy days may demand, shall thy strength ever be.

Fear not, I am with thee, O be not dismayed,For I am thy God and will still give thee aid;
I’ll strengthen and help thee, and cause thee to standUpheld by My righteous, omnipotent hand.

When through the deep waters I call thee to go,The rivers of woe shall not thee overflow;
For I will be with thee, thy troubles to bless,And sanctify to thee thy deepest distress.

When through fiery trials thy pathways shall lie,My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply;
The flame shall not hurt thee; I only designThy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine.

Even down to old age all My people shall proveMy sovereign, eternal, unchangeable love;
And when hoary hairs shall their temples adorn, Like lambs they shall still in My bosom be borne.

The soul that on Jesus has leaned for repose,I will not, I will not desert to its foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,I’ll never, no never, no never forsake.

Lord, Help Me Not To Forget

2006-07-13T10:28:00.000-07:00

So I had this thought the other day, and I shared it with several people and also decided to post on my blog. It's interesting how, you have revelations and no sooner then you put those words out there, here comes a test to challenge what you've said. BOY! Yesterday I was feeling like, "OK, I take back everything I said." But i can't take it back, and even if i could it doesn't make it anyless true. So I might as well gird up the loins of my mind to protect it from the mental onslaught of the enemy, and just KEEP ON believing God. So anyway, here goes...

My prayer is this, Lord help me not to forget, so quickly the victories that you have given me. Help me to forever give you praise and thanksgiving for the things you’ve done in my life, big or small. I was listening to a message that Bro Storts preached called “Seeking The Lord” and in the message he mentioned that some people live right in the present. They tend to be affected, mostly by their current distress, discomfort, fear, etc… And they don’t even consider the times God has made them victorious in the past. He said it’s almost as of the past does not exist. Sad, huh? Whatever happened to, each victory will help you, some other to win???? I have to be able to see God beyond my current situation. The writer of the book of Lamentations says that he remembers the bitterness, the gall and the wormwood, but in that he finds hope. Because it was of the Lord’s mercy that we are not consumed! Great is they faithfulness! If I focus more on the faithfulness of God then I won’t be so troubled by my present situation.

A lot of our tests and trials are just l like that old giant Goliath. Goliath was flesh and blood and though he was a BIG man, he was still only a man, he was mortal. Yet, he defied the armies of God as if he were invincible. He put fear into the hearts of the children of Israel just by his size and his threatening alone!!! And you know what, he only HAD that power because the children of Israel gave it to him, they listened to him and believed what he said thusly giving the Giant more power of them then he had in just his size alone! Isn’t that how the enemy is? With each new test he’s calling out our name, reminding us of all the times we’ve tried before and failed. And the Giant keeps telling us time and time and time again, Boy/Girl you’ll NEVER win!!!! He will talk to your mind like an natural man, from sun up to sun down constantly talking to our minds and presenting the test like it’s the BIGGEST we’ve EVER encountered. And if we listen and let past failures or mistakes rule the day, we’ll make his words true. But, I like David’s attitude, he recalled some victories in his past that gave in confidence to go out and fearlessly face that giant!

Lamentations 3: 19 Remembering mine affliction and my misery, the wormwood and the gall. 20My soul hath them still in remembrance, and is humbled in me. 21 This I recall to my mind, therefore have I hope. 22It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. 23 They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. 24The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him. 25 The LORD is good unto them that wait for him, to the soul that seeketh him. 26It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD.

I Samuel 17:33 And Saul said to David, Thou art not able to go against this Philistine to fight with him: for thou art but a youth, and he a man of war from his youth. 34 And David said unto Saul, Thy servant kept his father's sheep, and there came a lion, and a bear, and took a lamb out of the flock: 35 And I went out after him, and smote him, and delivered it out of his mouth: and when he arose against me, I caught him by his beard, and smote him, and slew him. 36 Thy servant slew both the lion and the bear: and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be as one of them, seeing he hath defied the armies of the living God. 37 David said moreover, The LORD that delivered me out of the paw of the lion, and out of the paw of the bear, he will deliver me out of the hand of this Philistine. And Saul said unto David, Go, and the LORD be with thee.

Another Day...

2006-06-14T19:24:00.000-07:00

Today was pretty normal, aka...boring. I awakened and thought my usual "Oh God, not again! When does it end!?!?!" I was able to get ready without too many issues, on the bus and to work. Work was pretty mundane, but I don't have any real complaints.

I had an opportunity to go to my high school today to order transcripts. It was quite interesting actually. It epitomized the message Pastor Lloyd preached during the revival; it was titled "The Season That Breathes Life Into the Spirit of Laciviousness". I actually felt bad for many of them because i realized that the vain deceits and spirits they give themselves to don't go away, or get any better as they get older, but usually they grow deeper and escalates to a point where they are beyond control. I'm so glad to be free from the bondage of vanity. You know what I mean?

Other than that, nothing too interesting going on. I saw my brother Jerms tonight, that was pretty cool. I spent some time with my family, now i'm fixin to go to bed.

Were you hoping for something more on this blog? Oh well, what you don't want is what you get, on this blog today! Peace!

Jackie

Birthday

2006-06-13T07:38:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked the 24th year that i've been on this earth. I had the pleasure of hanging out with several cool YP on Sunday evening at the Joliet Applebee's to celebrate. Thanks to everyone who came and made my day special!

Yesterday, I spent the day at work during various mundane tasks. In the afternoon the HR and Finance departments came to my office where we had an opportunity to partake in some delicious chocolate cake, and a rather dry off/key version of "Happy Birthday". It was the thought that counted; besides the cake was really good!

After work I went with several of my girlfriends to Grand Lux Cafe for dinner. That was VERY nice and relaxing and just an all around good time. For dinner i had a shrimp pasta and had a slice of carrot cake for desert. I actually didn't eat the carrot cake because i was quite full! After dinner we walked to Starbucks for coffee/tea; we departed from thence to our several domestic habitations. :)

I was blessed to get a number of sweet gifts; My mom bought me a really nice outfit, and she and my dad got me a Dozen Pink roses. My dad also gave me money for brkfst/lunch and paid for parking on yesterday. THEN i got to work and our receptionist called me and told me i had a package at the front desk, and it was another floral arrangement from my dad! I took pictures which i will probably try to post soon. I also got a skirt from my sister. From my friends i got a number of different cool gifts including a Nordstrom gift card, a Lane Bryant gift card, a box of chocolate and some lip gloss that is also breath freshener. All in all I had a good birthday.

I am very glad to be alive and very thankful for life, health and strength, to have a reasonable portion of my right mind :), for my family, my job, for good friends and a good Church Family. God has really blessed my life, and not just with material things, but with people who love me and who are willing to make sacrifices for me. I really believe that one of the main ways God expresses his love through us is through others. I feel the love the family, friends, saints and thusly, I feel the love of God. It's a wonderful feeling.

Well that's about it for now. I do resolve, however, to be a little more diligent in updating this blog thing. We'll see how that goes....

King Asa

2005-11-16T12:43:00.000-08:00

I was thinking about Bro Howard’s message on last week, and more specifically the story of King Asa. I thought I’d just share a little bit of what I was thinking.

The story can be found in II Chronicles the 15th and 16th Chapters. From the beginning of his reign, God assured Asa that he was with him.

II Chronicles 15:1
1 And the Spirit of God came upon Azariah the son of Oded: 2 And he went out to meet Asa, and said unto him, Hear ye me, Asa, and all Judah and Benjamin; The LORD is with you, while ye be with him; and if ye seek him, he will be found of you; but if ye forsake him, he will forsake you. 3 Now for a long season Israel hath been without the true God, and without a teaching priest, and without law. 4 But when they in their trouble did turn unto the LORD God of Israel, and sought him, he was found of them. 5 And in those times there was no peace to him that went out, nor to him that came in, but great vexations were upon all the inhabitants of the countries. 6 And nation was destroyed of nation, and city of city: for God did vex them with all adversity. 7 Be ye strong therefore, and let not your hands be weak: for your work shall be rewarded. 8 And when Asa heard these words, and the prophecy of Oded the prophet, he took courage, and put away the abominable idols out of all the land of Judah and Benjamin, and out of the cities which he had taken from mount Ephraim, and renewed the altar of the LORD, that was before the porch of the LORD.
When Asa heard the word of the Lord, from the prophet, he was encouraged. So encouraged that he begin to tear down the idols in the kingdom. For a time he was a great leader. Look at all the works he did, because of his faith in God. He even removed his mother from being Queen because of her idol worshipping. A good leader, that had no respect of person.

9 And he gathered all Judah and Benjamin, and the strangers with them out of Ephraim and Manasseh, and out of Simeon: for they fell to him out of Israel in abundance, when they saw that the LORD his God was with him. 10 So they gathered themselves together at Jerusalem in the third month, in the fifteenth year of the reign of Asa. 11 And they offered unto the LORD the same time, of the spoil which they had brought, seven hundred oxen and seven thousand sheep. 12 And they entered into a covenant to seek the LORD God of their fathers with all their heart and with all their soul; 13 That whosoever would not seek the LORD God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman. 14 And they sware unto the LORD with a loud voice, and with shouting, and with trumpets, and with cornets. 15 And all Judah rejoiced at the oath: for they had sworn with all their heart, and sought him with their whole desire; and he was found of them: and the LORD gave them rest round about. 16 And also concerning Maachah the mother of Asa the king, he removed her from being queen, because she had made an idol in a grove: and Asa cut down her idol, and stamped it, and burnt it at the brook Kidron. 17 But the high places were not taken away out of Israel: nevertheless the heart of Asa was perfect all his days. 18 And he brought into the house of God the things that his father had dedicated, and that he himself had dedicated, silver, and gold, and vessels. 19 And there was no more war unto the five and thirtieth year of the reign of Asa.

II chronicles 16
In the six and thirtieth year of the reign of Asa Baasha king of Israel came up against Judah, and built Ramah, to the intent that he might let none go out or come in to Asa king of Judah. 2 Then Asa brought out silver and gold out of the treasures of the house of the LORD and of the king's house, and sent to Benhadad king of Syria, that dwelt at Damascus, saying, 3 There is a league between me and thee, as there was between my father and thy father: behold, I have sent thee silver and gold; go, break thy league with Baasha king of Israel, that he may depart from me. 4 And Benhadad hearkened unto king Asa, and sent the captains of his armies against the cities of Israel; and they smote Ijon, and Dan, and Abelmaim, and all the store cities of Naphtali. 5 And it came to pass, when Baasha heard it, that he left off building of Ramah, and let his work cease. 6 Then Asa the king took all Judah; and they carried away the stones of Ramah, and the timber thereof, wherewith Baasha was building; and he built therewith Geba and Mizpah. 7

For a space of time, there was peace in Judah, because Asa’s heart was perfect and sought to please God. It was in the 36th year that things began to turn. Baasha, the King of Israel, began to build Ramah (a city or forte) to control people going in and out of Judah (where Asa was the King). Asa then took the silver and gold out of the house of the Lord (see II Chronicles 15:18…he had dedicated this silver and gold to the Lord) and sent it to Benhadad the King of Syria. Obviously a powerful King and leader, but not one who served God. He encouraged the King of Syria to break their league with Israel make a league or covenant with Judah. So Benhadad did that, and began to attack the cities of Israel. So much so that they left off building Ramah to go and protect their own cities. Then, King Asa and all of Judah went and gathered the materials left by Baasha, the king of Israel, and built his own cities/forts. Judah was safe, but God wasn’t pleased. After all the things Asa had done to please God, at some point his faith began to fail him. He relied on man rather than on God to deliver him. God sent a prophet to Asa to deliver God’s message.

And at that time Hanani the seer came to Asa king of Judah, and said unto him, Because thou hast relied on the king of Syria, and not relied on the LORD thy God, therefore is the host of the king of Syria escaped out of thine hand. 8 Were not the Ethiopians and the Lubims a huge host, with very many chariots and horsemen? yet, because thou didst rely on the LORD, he delivered them into thine hand. 9 For the eyes of the LORD run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect toward him. Herein thou hast done foolishly: therefore from henceforth thou shalt have wars.

Look at what Asa’s unbelief and fear led too. After 35 years of peace, there was war, because he decided to trust man rather than God. And it’s not like God hadn’t proven himself to Asa before. God hadn’t given Asa ANY reason to doubt his power and strength. From the beginning God had promised Asa that if he would be with God, God would be with him.

10 Then Asa was wroth with the seer, and put him in a prison house; for he was in a rage with him because of this thing. And Asa oppressed some of the people the same time. 11 And, behold, the acts of Asa, first and last, lo, they are written in the book of the kings of Judah and Israel. 12 And Asa in the thirty and ninth year of his reign was diseased in his feet, until his disease was exceeding great: yet in his disease he sought not to the LORD, but to the physicians. 13 And Asa slept with his fathers, and died in the one and fortieth year of his reign. 14 And they buried him in his own sepulchres, which he had made for himself in the city of David, and laid him in the bed which was filled with sweet odours and divers kinds of spices prepared by the apothecaries' art: and they made a very great burning for him.

Behold the acts of Asa, first and last. A great king, and leader, who had a heart that was perfect towards God. But unbelief and fear set in, and in his end, he would not seek God.
Lord help me, to be patient and trust in you. Keep in my mind the MANY victories that you have given me, the miracles that you’ve worked on my behalf, so that I won’t be like Asa. Definitely a lesson to be learned. But, to encourage us, it says “…the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect towards him.” God help me not to be foolish, and trust my flesh, or any persons flesh above the power of God!! I will have confidence that WHATEVER battle i'm facing, I CANNOT depend on the things of the world to give me victory, but God alone!

A Full Day

2005-06-12T06:38:00.000-07:00

Sooo...it's been a while since i've actually taken time to update my blog. Well today is a special day, for several reasons, so i thought it would be appropriate to update on a day like today. Why is it so special?

June 12, 1975 My parents, James and Janie Larry, were married. Yup! So they're celebrating 30 years of marriage on today. Congrats to them.

seven years later....

June 12, 1982 to this union was born a very special baby girl, ME!!! lol! Yup today is my 23rd birthday (i know i'm young, i feel sooo much older, but the dates are accurate).

and last but not least....

June 12, 2005 Jessica Maureen Larry (my older sister) receives her Masters Degree in Sociology. A great accomplishment! Congrats Jess!

So needless to say, with graduation and other celebrations, our day is gonna be jam packed, busy and hectic. Let the fun begin!!!!!

2005-05-08T20:00:00.000-07:00

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!! If you're a mother...:). Anyhoo, life is good. It was a nice day, for the most part. My mom, sister and I made dinner for today. Actually, we stayed up until like 1 AM cooking, but it was worth it. We had a few guests over, some of the saints and my cousin and his son. Good company, good food, what more can we ask for. After dinner i washed my car. By the way, i REAAALLYYYY like my car. Would you like to see pics? Please visit my Picture site.
http://jackielarry.tripod.com/jacksonsphotoalbum

I guess that's about it for now. More interesting things actually happen during my day, but by the time i sit down to blog, i have generally forgotten everything that has gone on. Oh well.

2005-04-29T07:53:00.000-07:00

HEY!! Feel free to leave comments on the blog. When you click the "leave a comment button" you can either 1.) Log in if you have a blogger account 2.) Leave a comment as "other" or 3.) Leave an "anonymous" comment

So yeah, do it!!!

In other news, there is one month until the Revival/Fellowship Meeting. Soooo excited!!!! I'll give more details later!! Back to work!!!!

Music | Timeless Truths Free Online Library

2005-04-28T20:40:00.000-07:00

Music | Timeless Truths Free Online Library

A great resource for good old fashion hymns. One of my very favorite websites to visit.

new car

2005-04-23T06:42:00.000-07:00

Hello all! I just wanted the world to know that i FINALLY have my very own car!!! THANK YOU JESUS!!!! Yup last night it became official. I have an 02 Honda Accord, SE, Coupe. VERY NICE! I love it...or rather really really like it. Hopefully i'll have pics of it soon. (Yeah i know, like you care!!!). Anyhoo i better get going. I have go to Joliet for an all day thing with the childrens choir and then a Single Sisters dinner/event/thingamajiggy. BYE!

Contemplation...

2005-04-02T20:38:00.000-08:00

So, I was listening to a song about the death of Jesus Christ today, and started contemplating his life, my life and the state of the world. And i realized, it's just as the scripture says in the last days men will be "Lovers of themselves more than lovers of God." And how true that is. People drive selfishly, talk loudly on their cellphones in public (selfishly), are nasty and rude (selfishly), will hurt others just for the sake of it (selfishly), are not willing to commit to their families, responsiblities and most importantly God. I believe, that at the root of every war, is one selfish act. No matter who is on the offense and who is on the defense, somewhere someone(s) have acted selfishly. And i belive what pleases God more than anything is, to have our love. He wants to have our devotion, undivided attention, affection, dedication. He wants it all. He wants to be our friend, lover of our soul, confidant, the JOY of our DESIRE...the OBJECT of our AFFECTION. And in order for him to have that, we ...I...cannot be selfish. What a sad world we live in. People are depressed, angry, misunderstood, and grossly misled. And all the time God is waiting to heal. Heal the nation and heal individual hearts, but people aren't turning to him. They want THEIR WAY, THEIR RELIGION, THEIR IDEAS, THEIR OPINION, and it's all rightheousness in THEIR eyes. I've never seen so much justification of wrongdoing in my life. People feel that the are ok, Holy, and a good person if they harbor prejudices and hatred and even stereotypes of another race. They feel like they are justified to seek their own happiness(a happiness that is never really TRULY receieved), even at the expense of others.
I love the Lord, Jesus Christ, he gave UNSELFISHLY. Can we even comprehend that kind of love? From time to time i hear religious people get indignant about "Why did they do my Jesus like that?" "Why did they HAVE to kill him?". It was his way. It was his whole purpose for coming. What is more important, his birth or his death? "If it had not been for the shedding of blood there would be NO remission of sin." So many thoughts are running through my mind now. So many feelings i want to express, about the deep deep love of God. How can we escape if we neglect so great a salvation? Jesus, gave ALL he had. He suffered more than he HAD to for a world who would reject him time after time. Do we understand that kind of love? Do we understand how we are rejecting his love everytime we say and do a mean or spiteful thing? Do we understand how we are rejecting him, when we choose our way over his? Do we understand how we are rejecting him when we get impatient in waiting on God and murmur and complain about "Why do I have to go through this God?". Do we understand how we are rejecting him when we choose to be impatient with those around us? Do we understand how we are rejecting him when we choose to harbor a grudge or a bias? Do we REALLY understand? Do we REALLY know what Jesus did, and why he did it, and what we need to do and WHY we need to do it?

The world is full of many problems. I was thinking about Mel Gibson's movie "The Passion of the Christ" today. I never saw the movie, but i do remember reading once an interview someone had with Mel Gibson. He was asked what change would he hope his movie brings, and he said "War Ends". A noble, beautiful answer. BUT, what if we asked Jesus Christ...."Jesus, what change would you like your death to bring about?". Perhaps he would say "Sin ends!!!" War is not the problem, selfishness is.

James 4:1 From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members?
2 Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not.
3 Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.

Do we ask God for strength, to hurt others? Do we ask God for blessings, for ourselves, our flesh?

My prayer lately has been, "Lord teach me how to love you. Show me and tell me the things that please you. God i want you to be happy, happy with me, not because i'm doing the things I want to do, but because Lord i am seeking with all my heart to please you. Show me how to win your heart Jesus. Lord teach me to love everyone like you did. Lord, I know that means that sometimes i'll love and NEVER receive love in return. Teach me Lord how to give myself over to love. Love for my family, love for your people, and love for souls. That's my prayer and my one desire."

HAVE YOU HEARD!?!?!?

2005-03-26T21:08:00.000-08:00

HE IS RISEN!!!!! Praise the Lord, we have the VICTORY (aka the 240) because he lives. Victory of SIN and SELF!!! Because he lives, I can face tomorrow, because he lives, all fears are gone, because i know who holds the future, my life is worth the living just because he lives!!!!

Wireless

2005-03-22T19:18:00.000-08:00

Hey All!! Just thought i'd update and spread good tidings of great joy. I HAVE WIRELESS INTERNET ACCESS for my laptop. I'm so happy. Now i don't have to meander about in the upstairs hallway hoping for a chance to use someone elses computer/internet. It was kind of expensive (to me) to get the wireless box and adaptor, but in the long run i think it will be worthwhile. I mean who knows, maybe i'll update more. :)

On another note, i'm listening to this really good song "When All Is Said And Done" by Tommy Walker. It says "When all is said and done, Lord you're all i want." Amen and amen.

Even without wireless internet abilities, i would rather have Jesus ANYDAY!!

Good News and Sad News

2005-02-16T12:03:00.000-08:00

Hello Everyone!!!

Well i decided to somewhat update today, just because. A lot of things have been happening lately, some good, and some bad.

Sad News---Sister Liz Wiggins passed away. She will be greatly missed...And please remember her family in prayer.

Good News---My mom has a new car. It's very nice....2005 Toyota Camry XLE. I REALLY like Toyota. It kind of surprised me because she went to get service on her other car (2000 Volvo S80...another nice car) and somehow ended up at a Toyota dealership. It must be nice.

I guess that's about it for now. I'll try to update again soon. :)

He Is Able

2005-02-11T06:36:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning with this song on my heart....

He is able more than able
To accomplish what concerns us today
He is able, more than able
To handle anything that comes our way
He is able, more than able
To do much more than we could ever dream
He is able, more than able
To make us what he wants, us to be

If I know nothing else, I know that when the world says it's over, the master says NO, I've JUST begun. God is MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE than able. I serve the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. The VERY SAME GOD that parted the Red Sea. The VERY SAME GOD that created the earth and all therein. He is so awesome and great, YET he is TOUCHED with the very feeling of our infirmities. I'm so glad God is more than able.

Wherever You Are by The Martins

2005-02-10T09:43:00.000-08:00

Here are some awesome song lyrics. My favorite part is where it says "The will of God won't lead you, where the grace of God can't keep you." It's such a blessing to know that if I am in the will of God, I don't have to fear making decisions (or the outcome of decisions I make). God's grace is sufficient in all things. I can go forth in my life with confidence and no fear, because of Jesus Christ.

Wherever You Are

Are you standing
At a crossroad
Wondering which road you should take
And you're dreading
The decision
And a possible mistake
But the will of God won't lead you
Where the grace of God can't keep you
You will never be out of His care
Remember that the Lord's already there

(chours)
Wherever you are
Wherever you're going
God is right there beside you
Seeing and knowing
Wherever you go
He already knows
What lies ahead and what's behind
You'll always find He's never too far
From wherever you are

(verse 2)
You are waiting
To hear thunder
And see lightening in the sky
Oh, but God can
Work His wonders
Through a still small voice inside
Just keep listening and learning
And continue on your journey
Following the One who is the way
He's the only road you need to take
(chorus)

Tai Chi/Chai Tea

2005-02-10T05:59:00.000-08:00

Scenario: "Good Morning, welcome to Starbucks. May I take your order please"

"Um, yes. I'd like a tall Tai Chi latte with skim milk please."

Yes, yes that was me. Only I could go to Starbucks and order a tall, ancient Chinese form of exercise and meditation. The Starbucks guy from yesterday was like, "Um, excuse me. What did you say you wanted?". I mean come on!! Like i'm the only person who has ever ordered Tai Chi instead of Chai Tea. It's not my fault they sound so similar. I think i'm gonna have to stop trying to broaden my horizon, and just stick with my Pumpkin Spice Latte.

Hey, and what about that new drink "Chantico!!!" One lady says it's like drinking a melted chocolate candy bar. A small contains @400 calories. WOW!! I am definitely afraid of that.

In other news, the good weather has come and gone. It is now winter again. All in all it's not too bad, I mean the weather COULD be a lot worse, so I won't complain.

Well i think that's about it for now. I got to work REALLY early so i decided to drop a line to my loyal reader. LOL!! oops...readers :)

Anyhoo God bless ya'll and keep the....Faith.

News Release

2005-02-07T18:38:00.000-08:00

News Release

I'm just checking out my "Blog This" icon. Anyhoo, it's an interesting article about my school.

Baby's Are Beautiful

2005-02-05T11:35:00.000-08:00

Erica Joy and Tierre Brunson have delivered a beautiful baby boy. I say "beautiful" because i believe all baby's are beautiful and precious and "fearfully and wonderfully made". Yup "Mr. Taj McKinley Brunson". So Congrats to them!!!

In other news, my life has not been terribly exciting. Last week at work i was super busy because I had to organize a New Staff Orientation. I was hot the entire week because i was literally running (or at least walking very fast) at a lot of points during the day. Needless to say when i finally went to bed last night I would say it was only a matter of moments and i was "OUTTA HERE!!!"....in other words i was fast asleep.

We've been having good weather in Chicago of late. The snow is finally melting!! WHOO HOO!!! Yesterday I took a walk with my boss and a few of my co-workers over to the State of IL building to see a program about Women and Heart Disease. It was such a nice walk and i don't think any of us really wanted to come back to the office. It was like 44 degrees, the sun was shining, it was a beautiful day. I like Chicago when the weather is nice because even the people are nicer. Just last week I was thinking about moving to like.....I don't know where....but anywhere other than cold Chicago. I guess as far as city's go i'm a "fair weather" friend. :) Today looks like just as nice a day so i 'm not gonna stay here much longer. I have chores to do and THEN i'm gonna take advantage of this beautiful day.

In closing, visit this site: www.americanheart.org. February is American Heart Month, and they have a lot of activities going on and great campaign going on called "Go Red For Women". It is program designed to create more awareness to the fact that heart disease is the number one killer of women. Some important facts and information on that site. So check it out, and share with a woman you love!!!

Well, as i leave please don't forget to visit my other site and sign the guestbook OR you can just leave a message on my blog!! I think it's great to hear from people. :)

...And beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts...

You Raise Me Up

2005-01-27T11:35:00.001-08:00

Lyrics to a popular song that Lisa Jennings and I kind of tweaked...made it more personal...Enjoy!!!

“You Raise Me Up”

Verse 1: There was no life no life without the saviour
My sinful heart beat so imperfectly
And then you came and changed my life completely
And raised me up to more than I could be.

Verse 2: When I was down, in sin and sinking lower
Your loving had reached down and lifted me
Now I’ll go forth conquering and to conquer

You’ve raised me up with victory over sin.

Verse 3: When the devil comes and makes my heart feel weary
When troubles come and my heart burdened be
Then I am still and wait to hear you father
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

Verse 4: My life, my love, My all I give to you lord
I know that I can’t make it without you
You gave me hope, You gave me life worth living
And some sweet day I’ll live eternally

Chorus
You raise me up so I can stand on mountains
You raise me up to walk on stormy seas
I am strong when I am on your shoulder
You raise me up to more than I can be

Pictures

2005-01-22T19:24:00.000-08:00

Hello!!!! As you can see i'm working on this here contraption and trying to make it a little more interesting. I've added a few pictures, it didn't quite turn out how i like it, but oh well, so goes life. Anyhoo....There are a couple of pictures of the snow. It was dark outside so you might not get the full effect of it...but nonetheless there they are. Have i mentioned lately that i DO NOT like snow??? (LOL...i'm sure i have).

Well this was in interesting weekend. Our revival service was cancelled today because the roads were in really bad condition because of the....you got it....the snow. So I ended up staying home and sitting on the phone for HOURS with Microsoft and Dell technical support (my mom needed me to do some stuff to her computer). It's actually working quite well if i don't say so myself. I may have to doctor up my own computer.

Kyle, my nephew came by today and that's always interesting. We're not used to having a 5 year old in our midst, and when he comes around things get MIGHTY interesting. We made little cutout snowflakes. We were trying to distract him because he INSISTED he wanted to go OUTSIDE and make a snowman...in the blizzard...that was sooooo not going to happen. "It was NOT even that kind of party!!!"

Well that's my life. Pretty boring, huh? Yeah, yeah, I know. You sit and WAIT for me to update this terribly neglected pink site, and when i do all i can talk about is....snow. Maybe if i exercise myself more, by doing daily....well....semimonthly updates i'll have more interesting stuff to say after awhile. But you be the judge, which means you're gonna have to make a commitment to visit the site often and let me know what you think. (Unless of course what you think is negative, then just keep it to yourself).

Speaking of exercising (no i haven't been to Women's Workout World as I ought...that's a whole 'nother subject), I DID take some time today and worked on my pitiful piano skills. I'm really asking God to increase my musical gift and give me understanding where i lack, in the area of piano playing and vocal technique. I really enjoy singing and working with the children's choir, so i'm asking God to help me to be a better teacher and musician. I printed out a bunch of songs, lyrics and chords, and sat down with my handy dandy, Pocket Music Dictionary, and tryed to make sense of some of the songs. Some didn't sound so bad, others were a little more challenging. And i have a problem to with filling in the music between chords. Well with more practicing I hope God truly increases my knowledge. (Of course if any of you have an idea on how i can become a better musician, aside from taking lessons :), your thoughts are most welcome).

Anyhoo, that's about all i have to say for the night. Especially considering my mom has yelled my name a few times. I better stop "lollygagging" and go and do my evening chores.

Keep the faith all!!!

2005-01-22T19:20:00.000-08:00

Can you believe on Monday i'm gonna have to go to work in this snow!?!?!

2005-01-22T19:19:00.002-08:00

Snowy front of house

2005-01-22T19:19:00.001-08:00

More snow!! UGH

2005-01-22T19:19:00.000-08:00

Checkout the grill in the snow!!!

2005-01-22T19:18:00.002-08:00

Snowy Backyard2

2005-01-22T19:18:00.001-08:00

Snowy Backyard

2005-01-22T19:18:00.000-08:00

Thoughts at Midnight

2005-01-21T23:57:00.000-08:00

So it's after midnight. I just got home from the revival service @ 12:30. We had a pretty bad snowstorm to hit us this evening. I don't know WHERE the snow trucks were/are, but it was pretty scary driving on I-57 and I-80. It took us like 1.5 hours (maybe longer than that) to get home. But God blessed, and the service was well worth it. Because weather conditions were so bad getting TO the service, we walked in right as the preaching began. God really met us....ME...in the service tonight. Pastor Lloyd preached on not letting the red horse rider take our peace. All i can say is.....mmm....mmmm...mmmm.... It was just what i needed to go that extra mile.

And it was like the devil wanted to kill us on the way home. A couple of times it seemed like I was out control of the car but God blessed. The tire traction wasn't so good and we ran out of windshield wiper fluid right when we got to where the snow was really coming down!! But nonetheless, we made it home safely, and i can't say enough that it was WELL WORTH the trip.

On a lighter note, I walked into a house full or 9 and 10 year old boys. :P. I guess i shouldn't really say "full", it's more like 4 ten year olds. I don't really understand 10 year old boys and their fascination with video games. I mean they have been playing for HOURS this one game about a car driving in the streets....weird. When i asked them about it they said that i don't understand (I guess because i'm a girl). They say we like that "Cinderella Stuff". Oh well.

I'm not sure that anything i wrote made sense. It's getting late and i am soooo tired. So i'm gonna go to bed and try again tomorrow. One love!! Keep the faith!!!

My Prayer

2005-01-21T12:54:00.002-08:00

So far the revival has been going very well. I'm excited about what God's going to do before it's over. And i'm going with an expectation to receive something deeper in my soul.

During my devotion the other night i came across the lyrics to this song and it really bore witness with my spirit. I don't know the melody of the song, but the words are resonating in my mind. This is SERIOUSLY "my prayer".

My Prayer

by P.P. Bliss

More holiness give me, More strivings within;

More patience in suff'ring, More sorrow for sin;

More faith in my Saviour, More sense of His care;

More joy in His service, More purpose in prayer.

More gratitude give me, More trust in the Lord;

More pride in His glory, More hope in His word;

More tears for His sorrows, More pain at His grief;

More meekness in trial, More praise for relief.

More purity give me, More strength to o'ercome;

More freedom from earth-strains, More longings for home;

More fit for the kingdom, More used would I be;

More blessed and holy, More, Saviour, like Thee.

Birthday's and Revivals

2005-01-20T14:46:00.003-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JALEN OSCAR LARRY!!!!

Yesterday was Jalen's 10th birthday!! Amazing, because i like, remember when he was born. I remember when he was cute and adorable and huggable and kissable. I wouldn't DREAM of kissing him now (I might get punched in the nose). Anyhoo, my my my, how time flies.

Yesterday also started our revival. Pastor Hodges was our "Evangelist" for the first night. Tonight, through Sunday, Pastor Davelle Lloyd of Sharon, TN will be bringing forth the message. I'm excited about the revival and what God is doing for the Church of God in Joliet, IL.

Overwhelmed

2004-12-18T17:23:00.000-08:00

Wow!!!! It's been like 3 months since i've updated, I guess i'm not a real "blogger" afterall. I guess it's gets to be kind of a hassle trying to come up with interesting topics to discuss EVERYDAY.

Today was an ok day. I had a wonderful breakfast, compliments of Bob Evans. I had french toast and some WONDERFUL turkey sausage i bought from Jewels. I got up this morning with the intent of making some cookies, i got as far as gathering all the ingredients and then i somehow lost my burden for butter cookies. It's nice to have a day where you do, pretty much, absolutely nothing. I did run a few errands, but for the most part i just stayed around the house.
I DO PLAN ON, before the night is over, kind of updating my websites. We'll see how that goes.
http://jackson-larr.tripod.com
http://jackielarry.tripod.com/jacksonsphotoalbum

Soooooooo, my last update was about my fabulous job God blessed me with. Well, 3 months later and it's STILL fabulous!!! As a matter of fact, i'm in line for a promotion. Yeah I know, amazing!!! But somehow or another my superiors seem to think i'm a good worker and worthy of this promotion. I don't exactly have the new position yet. I've had to apply and interview for and Executive Assistant position (fancy title for private secretary). But my immeadiate supervisors were very impressed with the job i've done since being with the company. Isn't God awesome???? I mean seriously, if they only knew how many days i sit at my desk and PRAY that things don't crash in around me, that God will give me wisdom and understanding because i don't have a CLUE....If they ONLY knew. But you know what amazes me, God will take nothing and a nobody and make them into something special. Sometimes i just sit and WONDER about my life, and the good things happening in my life, and it's almost TOO good to be true. Really, who AM I??? I don't consider myself to be very...special. Not necessarily. I don't consider myself to be especially pretty or beautiful (*ahem* i'm not exactly and OGRE either), I am and have always been and average student, not a good student, not a terrible student....just average, I wasn't a BAD child but i also wouldn't exactly say i was a GOOD child either, I think all the way around i am just simply an "average" person. I mean average almost to the point of "boring". Now, God is putting me in places and positions where people are telling me how "wonderful" i am, and i'm like NOOOOOOOOOO, not me. I'm the same as i've always been, EVERYTHING GOOD about me is AAALLLL because of G-O-D!!!! My point is this, I'm not anyone to take note of, but somehow, God saw (placed---however you want to look at it) something in me and to see him taking control of my life and helping me to acheive things that are beyond my comprehension are just simply AMAZING to me!!!!! One song writer said (and i TOTALLY agree with him) "What is man that thou art mindful of him, and could awesome God find common ground with him. Just to know that you delight to be with me, fills my heart with so much JOY!!!! Perfect and true pure in all your ways. Oh Lord there is none else like you, No one like you. And all these things keep me in AWE of you. And i'm OVERWHELMED that you would call me friend."

(sorry my thoughts are so sporadic.)

New Job

2004-09-29T16:45:00.000-07:00

Hey!!!! I'm still alive. I've decided to update my blog (even though i'm not sure if anyone even knows this thing exists). But many wonderful things have been happening in my life. 1.) I GOT A JOB!!!!!!!! Yup, God MORE than met my needs and expectations and blessed me with a job at the American Heart Association. It's kind of cool. I'm an administrative assistant, but it's a decent position with potential to grow. I miss the getting to work at 2 pm, like at the Humanities Center, but i'm thankful for what God has blessed me with.

In other news, Jenny had a birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENNY!!!!!! She's now officially_____.....old enough where she might not want me telling people how old she is.

Hmmmm....what else? I t hink that's about it for now.

PEACE OUT!!

UPDATES

2004-08-22T20:41:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to take time to update. Soooooo let's recap what's been going on...

1.) CONGRATULATIONS LISA JENNINGS for gaining her Masters Degree for Northwestern University in Education (?)

2.) HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLARE ROSE and ERICA JOY JONES

3.)Mom and Dad went on vacation to Phoenix, AZ, they're home now, so i guess WELCOME BACK to them!

4.) People are going back to school in the next few weeks, best wishes to ALL the students returning to school!!! (I actually start back September 8th, PRAY FOR ME PUH-LEASE. I'm asking God for (as one brother in our congregation put it) the "very SPIRIT of learning". Hmmmmm sounds like some serious stuff to me.)

Well that's it for now, there are a couple of impatient people rushing me off the computer (Jenny and Jalen). Well until next time, good bye and God bless!!!

Cell Phones and Google

2004-08-05T10:08:00.000-07:00

Just a simple question, what in the WORLD did we do before we had cellphones and google???? SOMEONE PUH-LEASE TELL ME!!!!!!!

Nothingness

2004-08-03T15:34:00.000-07:00

Just thought i'd add an entry to my blog today. Life is life, as usual. I had a meeting today witht he folks at the University of St. Francis. Yah i'm considering transferring. I wish i had more exciting news, but alas, I do not. I'm on my way tuesday night bible class. Hhhhmmm...one day i'm gonna have something really GOOD to say on this blog. Today is not the day. So that's it for today. Make sure u check out the sin no more site.

www.go-sin-no-more.com

Peace out!

Weather

2004-07-22T13:46:00.000-07:00

Soooo, already i seem to be slacking in the updating of my blog. So i decided to take some time today and yammer on about my life. Yesterday it stormed. Trees were knocked down, gates destroyed, pit bulls let out, and the power knocked out. We were without power until about 6 am. It's strange because our power was out, but the folks across the street had power. Anyhoo, i'm not complaining, i managed to survive the night without the internet. It was actually pretty fun. I played "Guesstures" with the family by flashlight. It seems that everything is a lot funnier in the dark. Including my dad sleeping on the couch and waking periodically to comment on the game. Yeah it was pretty funny.

In other news, it looks like it's gonna storm AGAIN!!! If you didn't know, I am ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED of storms. I don't like thunder AT ALL!!! But the way the trees are swaying and shaking it looks like it's gonna shape up to be a real humdinger.

New Blog

2004-07-15T13:19:00.000-07:00

I'M A BLOGGER!!!! I thought it'd be kind of neat to create this blog. I am not quite sure what the whole theme of it is, or will be, but right now, i'm just using it as a way for ya'll to get to know me. I guess the central idea is God. I am a saved, sanctified young woman therefore in everything i do, I must acknowledge and invite God to lead and guide my thoughts and expressions. Soooo there yah go, I'll try to keep this thing up as the Lord leads. WELCOME.

Singforjesus0612

Carnality

Disturbed..

A Reminder of God's Promises...

God's Tender One

Hold On By Moses Hogan

My Right To Vote...

Going after God in the wildernes...

Frustrations...

Fall Fashion Trends 2008...

The Death of the Righteous

I Asked The Lord

God's Way Is Best

Seperation...

My Glory

Warrior Is A Child/Do I Trust You Lord by Twila Paris

Revelation on the Thicket

Just for the sake of it...

Another Recipe...

Just like Mom's....

I'm up waaayyy too late...

Just one of those days...

We were born to make manifest the glory of God...

Why do people say the things that they say?

Passing the Time Away...

I Don't Want, No Knock-Off

What a Week!!

School Starts tomorrow...

All Things Work Together

Sing 'Til All the Clouds Remove

My Life Is In Your Hands

More Nike

My Heart Says Amen

NIKE

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Deception...

I'm Back!

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A Good Day...

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Lord, Help Me Not To Forget

Another Day...

Birthday

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A Full Day

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